Forum Parenting

My son can't do without his dummy!!! HELP

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  1. irma Guest #21

    so he slept through and the pacifier came later?

  2. N. Coppola started this #22

    Yeah, it's gotten extreme now! And his teeth are coming in too, so his sleep isn't 100% either. Like my mom always says: patience! There's not much else we can do. How old is your son?

  3. Anonymous Guest #23

    I won’t be getting a response from me like “why are you buying a house.” I have my own home, etc., but these are just choices you make in life. Yes, I’m that mom who wants to be at home with her kids. My husband and I made choices before we started having children. We made financial choices so that one of us can stay home with the kids.

    And no, we’re not lacking anything. We can still do what we want in life. If you make different choices, you have to stand by them.

    Also, here’s a tip about the pacifier. There are those chains to attach the pacifier to a piece of clothing. You can of course also attach it to the dummy. That way, it never goes far from the little one, and the “chain” is so short that they can’t hurt themselves with it.

  4. N. Coppola started this #24

    @ anonymous guest,

    I don't know if you're the same person as earlier

    We also made choices before starting a child and buying our house, etc..

    There are things that have happened in our private life where we had no other choice but for both of us to work..

    My husband is self-employed and his business is starting to grow slowly… but we're not going to take the risk of me working part-time right now!! That's not happening.. we're currently renovating our house and that costs money too…

    And my son always sleeps with a necklace with a tut attached to it anyway..

    But as I wrote in my previous post, either my son is lazy, or he's too young to do it himself.. I don't know, but he's definitely not making any effort!

  5. irma Guest #25

    My son is almost 2.5 months old.
    I'm going to work part-time, there's no other way. I'll probably have to work two jobs.
    I don't think I'll always be able to stay at home, but it's not bad to get out of the house, right?
    But that's each person's own choice.

    And otherwise, I have enough time for housework, the little one, and free time.
    We're not short on anything, but I'll still need to make some extra money. My parents are going to babysit, and since I work on weekends and my husband has office hours, it works out well.
    One week I work Monday, Wednesday, Friday from 7 to half past 2 = 18 hours, and the other week Monday, Wednesday, Friday and on the weekend mornings from 7 to 11 = 28 hours.

  6. * #26

    @Anonymous,

    And that's how everyone makes their choices... You/you who make yours. And that's how N. Coppola and her partner also make the choices they make. Respect that everyone is different in their decisions, and you don't always have to judge. I'm happy for you that you can do everything and that you made the choices you made... Live and let live...

  7. irma Guest #27

    And how did it go last night?
    What is it so hot, huh? Poor little ones!
    He sleeps a lot, does he do that with you too?
    Otherwise, he doesn't seem to have much trouble with the heat. Already had a nice bath and just had a nice cuddle.

    Here it's actually very good again. At 22:00, then 05:00, then 10:00, and from then on every 4 hours. In between, I give him water if needed. He doesn't really like it, but he drinks it anyway, which is a sign of extra fluids in the heat. So I do get to those 5 feedings per day.

    At 22:00, then +/- 05:00, then at 10:00, and then 14:00, 18:00, and then at 22:00.

  8. N. Coppola started this #28

    Hey Irma,

    Last night was short too, luckily I had already crawled into bed between 7pm and 11:30pm, so I managed to sleep a bit. I gave my little one his last bottle and he went to sleep around 12:30am, but he was already awake at 3am. Luckily I had taken a nap, otherwise I'd be a wreck at work!

    Your son is 2.5, so it's very normal that he still sleeps a lot. They start sleeping less around 4 months... that's how it was with my son, and I had read about it too.

    At first, my son didn't want any water either, but now he drinks a lot of it. With this weather, he drinks more than 100ml on his own, which is great! He even asks for it himself, and when he sees the bottle on the table, he spits out his dummy and signals that he wants to drink.

    And at that age, it's normal for them to have 5 feeds, even 6 is fine!

    Enjoy your little one while you can, because before you know it, the harsh reality sets in again!

    Greetings

  9. irma Guest #29

    And how are you and your little boy doing with his pacifier?
    Any changes? I hope so. Here he uses it when he's tired, and when he goes to sleep, the pacifier falls out on its own.

  10. N. Coppola started this #30

    Hi Irma,

    Thanks for thinking of me
    But now there's another problem, his teeth are coming in.
    On Thursday morning I wanted to see if another tooth was coming out from the bottom because he already has 4, I thought oh no another one is growing so he's crying, but on Friday morning I changed him when I saw that about 5 were coming out from the top! Now I understand why he's crying so much!
    Sometimes he cries for his dummy, but it's more crying from the pain, I smeared some soothing gel on his gums around 2am, then it got better, but before that he had to wake us up a few times, and yes luckily I went to bed early otherwise I'd be a wreck again! It's been almost 3 months for me and believe me I'm exhausted!!!!
    Did you do what I said? Give him a larger dose in his last bottle, I did it (and still do) my pediatrician told me to, then his stomach is full and he can sleep longer....

  11. Anonymous Guest #31

    My little boy is 5 months old and still asks for his dummy, especially in the afternoon during his nap... When he wakes up from his first sleep, he cries hard until I give him his dummy. At night it's occasional; there was a period where I had to get up 8 times, then a bit less, then a few days where I could stay in bed, and lately I have to get up about 3 times again. I'm going back to work next week, so that looks promising I'm also curious for tips on this.

  12. madelene #32

    I always have this feeling of just letting it be. They need it to calm down, after all. My oldest didn't have a pacifier, didn't like it either, clearly didn't like it. And my youngest clearly liked it. People would say, "Hey, you should wean her off." My brother-in-law said, "You should put something bitter on her thumb, something that doesn't taste good, then she'll learn to stop." She was 6 months old then. But I thought, let them talk, it's my child. And I also found it easy; she sucked her thumb when she was sad, and then she'd be fine again. Well, what does it matter if they're still young? When they're older, they'll have to give it up anyway. If they calm down from it, then so be it. That's how I see it, but everyone thinks differently, of course. Greetings, Madelene.

  13. madelene #33

    Oh sorry, my phone was typing weirdly. I meant that my oldest didn't thumb-suck and also didn't like a pacifier.
    My youngest, on the other hand, didn't like a pacifier but did thumb-suck.
    Something went wrong with the typing.
    Greetings, Madelene

  14. Rolinde Guest #34

    When I became a mother four years ago, my husband and I had chosen not to give our daughter a pacifier.
    It was quite an adjustment for us as new parents to be busy all day with bottle feeding and changing diapers.
    Our daughter was an easy baby for the first two months, sleeping a lot and crying little.
    When my maternity leave ended, I started working three days a week at the office for my boss.
    My mother offered to babysit, and Elise would go to her when I went to work.
    After work, I would quickly go back there, and my mother would tell me how the day had gone.
    I told her that Elise had been having a lot of crying spells lately, which was exhausting her.
    We could hardly soothe her, and that hurt us both a lot.
    She had also noticed it more often and advised me to try a pacifier.
    That same afternoon, I discussed it at home, and I went to the drugstore to buy a few.
    After dinner, my husband changed Elise, and I heard her crying again.
    We had already placed the pacifiers ready by the dresser, and she got one.
    The crying stopped quickly, after which he took her downstairs.
    Later, I put her to bed, and without fussing, she fell asleep.
    Elise is now almost four years old, and it’s really time to slowly say goodbye to it.

  15. Nicolle Guest #35

    My six-year-old son would also love to have his pacifier in all day long.
    He goes to school during the day and we've agreed with him that he's not allowed to bring it then.
    We've been living in Belgium for a few years now, and here you often see older children still using a pacifier.
    I have to admit that my husband and I have never really made an effort to help him quit.
    He's always been quite a busy kid, and honestly, we find it nice that things are a bit calmer at home.
    Mitchel is small for his age, and most customers who come to our house to drop off clothes for repair think he's a toddler.

  16. madelene #36

    Something like that is nice for the baby, a way for the child to calm down. I wouldn't discourage it too quickly, but just let them do it, especially at bedtime, because I think they need it to fall asleep calmly.

    My youngest princess never sucked her thumb. I also comforted her after a crying fit. My surroundings thought I should discourage it from her. Too bad for them, they had bad luck. My girl was allowed to suck her thumb by me. There will be plenty of things later that she has to unlearn.

    My husband gradually discouraged it during the day. She's 4 now, and it went well. I just gave her the time, and she still sometimes wants to do it at bedtime. My husband doesn't prefer that, but I'm like, let it be.

    Greetings, Madelene

  17. Annelotte Guest #37

    My girls also had the pacifier; otherwise, I wouldn't have had any night rest, so we let them sleep with the pacifier, and at some point, they didn't want it anymore on their own.

  18. Jasmijn Guest #38

    My son is 5 years old and he won't give up his dummy. He screams and cries for up to 30 minutes sometimes. I also have a full-time job and I'm exhausted The dentist said that if he keeps this up, his teeth will become misaligned. My husband says just let him keep it. Should I let him or not? Can you guys help me?

  19. Elineke #39

    Hey Jasmijn.

    What really helped us was letting him give the dummy fairy a present. He made a box himself and got to paint it; he was so proud of it. In the evening, he just put the dummy in the box and hung it on the door. He did ask about it afterwards, but then we could say that we didn't have it, but the dummy fairy did. And since then, he hasn't asked about it anymore. Hopefully, it works for you too.

    Best, Eline

  20. Mdv Guest #40

    My 10-year-old nephew had a pacifier until he was 2, and now he's discovered his thumb.
    I'm trying to help him quit, but he just keeps going at it—I don't get it.
    Oh yeah, my wife Verena is 28 and still does it too.
    I don't understand this family.

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