Not wanting to breastfeed

10 replies

SofieGuest · 2 months ago

I'm 30 weeks pregnant now and I decided early on that I don't want to breastfeed. The idea just doesn't feel right to me, and I think babies do just fine on formula. Still, I'm getting a lot of negative reactions from people around me, which is making me doubt myself again. What do you all think about my choice?

Replies

nienke Guest 2 months ago #2

That's totally fine! It's your choice! You need to feel good about it, and if you don't want to do it but do it anyway, it probably won't work out well. It takes some effort before breastfeeding gets going well and you and your baby find a rhythm.

Of course, breastfeeding is very good for your baby, but formula is too! My two boys both only had formula, and they are two healthy boys. For me, breastfeeding didn't get going (probably because the placenta didn't come off naturally after the oldest was born).

And I really didn't feel like doing all the feedings day and night myself.

Make it your own choice, together with your partner! By the way, my two maternity care assistants were completely on board with my second that I didn't start breastfeeding. It was my choice.
Djoke Guest 2 months ago #3

I think you should do what feels right for you. I'm pro-breastfeeding, but as a postpartum expert, I value peace and a happy mom even more. Do what feels good and don't apologize.
Robyn 2 months ago #4

Hey Sofie,

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I agree with the previous comments.
VB is indeed the best for your baby, but it will grow just fine on formula too.
My first child was raised on formula due to a failed attempt at VB.
I myself had huge regrets about not pushing through with VB, so this time I really wanted to give VB at all costs. And after many ups and downs, that worked out.
But I must honestly admit that VB takes quite a bit of effort to succeed, whereas formula is much simpler.
Do what feels right for you and don't let those comments bother you. Your baby, your choice.
Good luck with the birth!
Cin 2 months ago #5

I think you shouldn't let it bother you and just do what feels right for you!
This just doesn't work, these discussions always end up going on forever unfortunately..
I really didn't want to give up on breastfeeding in the beginning, but he was so tiny and it wasn't going well, so I tried it. Now it's been 3 weeks, I gradually reduced it and ended up switching to bottles anyway...
I just didn't have the patience for it. I had to use a nipple shield, which made me really nervous, and that's definitely not good for your baby...
With the 2nd and now also the 3rd, I went straight to bottle feeding... But hey, they're growing great anyway;-)
Olivia-Anna 2 months ago #6

It's indeed your own choice!
It's been your baby for 9 months and you should do what feels right for yourself..

The only advice I'd give you is:
Try it once..
Put them to the breast once when no one is around who might interfere.
Maybe you'll change your mind when you see your baby's loving reaction and your body's response.
I do it and I've never felt anything so beautiful!! You don't just see it, you experience it..
Personally, I can't do without it anymore!!
I think it's a privilege that only the mother can enjoy, and that feeling is blissful and unique..

But good luck with whatever you choose!!
Evelyn Guest 2 months ago #7

I'm really pro-breastfeeding, but I also think it's better to lovingly give the bottle than to force the breast against your will. Your baby will surely feel your motherly love! So just follow your gut...
Veronique Guest 2 months ago #8

Hi Sofie,

I just hope you make a really well-informed choice. Because if you say you think 'babies do fine too' on formula, I wonder if you've really taken the time to look into the differences properly.

Just know that babies who are formula-fed are more likely to get sick in the first year, have more ear infections, more respiratory infections, more diarrhea, colic, constipation, stomach/intestinal infections, or urinary tract infections. They also have a higher chance of allergic reactions. In the long term, formula-fed babies have a higher risk of obesity, childhood cancer, juvenile diabetes, and food sensitivities. All of this has been scientifically proven.

Of course, formula contains all the fats, proteins, and carbohydrates your baby needs. Plus, some vitamins are added. So yes, you'll grow big on it. But it also increases the risk of all the conditions mentioned above.
mamavan2 Guest 2 months ago #9

Hi Veronique,

I can only say that I understand someone wanting to give kv. I also gave kv to my daughter. For the first two years, she didn't get sick at all or anything like that. She's three now and has only had a cold a few times. So be careful with your comment, because you might make another expectant mother feel bad about herself.
You might want to look up the research on the difference between hypoallergenic formula and bv, just for fun.
Veronique Guest 2 months ago #10

Hi mamavan2,

I can certainly understand if someone wants to give formula. But what I can't understand is that people think formula and breast milk are about the same and don't bother to look into it. I'm glad you have such healthy babies, but it's a fact that the CHANCE of them getting sick is higher. That doesn't mean they will actually get sick. It just means there's a higher chance of it happening.

And I don't think it's right that it's my fault if someone feels guilty because I say what has been scientifically proven. Make your choice based on the right information and stand by it. You could, for example, click this link and read what the Nutrition Center says about breast milk.
http://http://www.voedingscentrum.nl/encyclopedie/moedermelk.aspx#blok3

By the way, I'd really like to read that research on hypoallergenic formula (which is still made from cow's milk, by the way) and breast milk. Do you know where I can find it? (I can't find anything on Google)
pvoorneveld 2 months ago #11

Hi!
My little one is now 1 week old.. breastfeeding is super easy and really lovely to do. It's truly amazing to see what these tiny babies can do and "know" about their own feeding.
They figure out how often they eat on their own, and that's pretty awesome!
I think everyone should decide for themselves whether they want to breastfeed or not..but I find it really great!

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