Forum Breastfeeding

Man doesn't support breastfeeding

5 replies

TTGuest ·
Hi ladies,
Our baby is now 2 weeks old. I really wanted to breastfeed. It hasn’t been smooth from the start; she wanted/couldn’t latch on. Now it’s going okay sometimes. But lately, I’ve been pumping constantly and giving her the bottle.
She’s realized that bottle-feeding is much easier and now refuses the breast. So we need to practice a lot more.
My husband doesn’t support me in this. In his family, no one has ever breastfed; they all grew up on formula. So it’s causing stress because he often says to just give formula and stop breastfeeding since it’s not working anyway.
But we’re only just starting, and she’s thriving on my milk, so why stop?
Do any of you have men who say this? It’s really not fun dealing with this stress.
Greetings

Replies

  1. An1990 #2

    My husband said the same thing, but it was mostly because he thought breastfeeding was causing me frustration and sadness (since it wasn’t going smoothly at all), and he just wanted me to feel better.
    I ended up stopping breastfeeding pretty quickly, and it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders!
    Of course, breastfeeding is still the best option, but a mom’s mental health is just as important.
    Maybe your husband is actually just worried about you.

  2. Veraaa #3

    That's really tough that you don't feel supported.
    First of all, congratulations on your little one.
    Well... breastfeeding doesn't come naturally. As mentioned above, it could certainly be a source of concern for your husband.
    Maybe talk it over calmly together? And perhaps agree that you'll keep trying for a certain number of weeks. I'd also call a lactation consultant for guidance. They might be able to help your baby learn to breastfeed quickly.
    Good luck... you'll surely find your way in this first crazy, special, beautiful, confusing, wonderful time

  3. Saar #4

    Oh, it's a shame your husband isn't supportive! My husband was fine with it all, but he wasn't as much of a breastfeeding fanatic as I am. If our kid didn't want to feed once as a child, he could have made a comment like, "Just use a bottle then?" But he always likes to tease me a bit

    And if you explain to him a bit that breastfeeding is a bit more intense at first, but once it's running and the baby is feeding well, it can be really easy and nice? And good for your little one? And that you just really want to do it, so it's nice if he supports you in that choice? Help with latching etc, instead of starting to talk about bottle feeding? If it really doesn't work out, you can always think about bottle feeding later, but your current attitude sounds pretty positive.

    And further, I agree with Veraa, definitely get a lactation consultant involved! It saves so much hassle if you can just breastfeed instead of pumping first! Good luck with it, hopefully it gets easier quickly!

  4. TT started this #5

    Thank you for your reply. I've been able to breastfeed so far, whether directly or pumped. It was getting better at the breast.
    But we talked it through and decided to wean at 6 weeks. It gives more peace of mind, as we had to go somewhere soon, and since breastfeeding isn't always successful, doing it in public isn't easy.
    I've made peace with it.
    Greetings

  5. GEMMA #6

    Hey, if my husband didn't support me, I'd still try. But be careful, babies get used to bottles quickly. I think BV is best for a baby. I breastfed my son until 11 months. Fenugreek helps increase milk supply. I had too much milk and had to freeze some. Follow your heart and do what's best for your baby. Formula is bad for their growth, etc., for me...

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