Forum The birth

Mother during childbirth?

57 replies · page 2 of 3

Replies

Page 2 of 3

  1. Liesseling #21

    My mom and aunt were there for my first one, since I was so young and had to do it alone. This time it's just me and my husband, and my 13-year-old daughter can come along if she feels up to it.

  2. D Guest #22

    My partner couldn't be there from the start during my first IVF with a long commute. I asked my mom and she really wanted to be there! It's such a special thing for a mother to see her daughter give birth.. I wished that for her too. Unfortunately, we both didn't know that I wouldn't dilate and that I'd have to spend 20 hours in the hospital before the little one came. I had so much pain from the contractions that I asked for an epidural and I cried with every contraction, it was so intense. My mom found it terrible to see me in pain and cried with me! Due to the possibility of a C-section, I wasn't allowed to eat there, and my mom and I were so hungry in the evening! She was allowed to eat but didn't because she couldn't bring herself to eat knowing that I was hungry but couldn't eat. We sat there together crying and starving haha. Eventually, my partner arrived just in time when I was allowed to push and he and my mom helped me through it.. I didn't feel uncomfortable at all that my mom was there. After all, she gave birth to me? It's actually very special that she gave birth to me and now watched me give birth haha. And I'll never forget how she supported me all night long, she was awake the whole time like me and lived it with me. And it was a girl, so beautiful to sit there with three generations. If you have a good relationship with your mom, I'd say take her with you! It will only strengthen your bond and if she can't handle it, she can always step out of the room. My mom found it difficult because she saw her daughter in pain, but she supported me from start to finish and I'm still grateful for that!

  3. anoniem #23

    Funny that there are suddenly replies coming in since this post was made half a year ago.

    My delivery was already almost 4 months ago and my mother was there when our beautiful daughter was born.....it was wonderful.....my mother loved being there and both she and my husband were a big support for me during and also after the delivery...which was indeed 5.5 weeks too early.
    But luckily our little girl is doing well
    My father wasn't at the delivery, but stood in the room barely an hour later to admire his granddaughter....they are both crazy about her.

    @D: sounds like a tough delivery, glad your mother was such good support.

  4. D Guest #24

    Oh yeah haha I didn't check the start date, saw recent posts here so I replied too. Wow, 5.5 weeks early is no joke! What a surprise, you definitely don't expect that. Nice that everything went well and is going well! Congratulations! Lovely that you still mentioned that your mom was there after all, yes mothers are great, right .

  5. Anonymous #25

    My mom was there too. I really wanted that, and she was happy to be there too. No one comes between the bond I have with my mom, and no one comes between the bond my mom has with my daughter either, and I'm super proud of that

    Anonymous congratulations on your daughter!

    Liesseling, I was 13 when I witnessed the birth of my little brother, and except for my own childbirth, that was the most special moment of my life. The bond between my brother and me is also really much stronger than with my older brother. You experience everything much more consciously at that age. So you really saw him grow from a baby to an adult man with a wife and child Hopefully your daughter will dare to do it, I wouldn't have missed it for any gold!

  6. madelene #26

    Chantieeeee I also have such a good, strong bond with my mom. She’s also such a lovely mom outside of being my best friend And she’s very close with her grandchildren too. My little girls, of course. They mean more to her than just being her grandchildren; she’d go through fire for them. Liesseling, it’s impressive that you could even consider having your 13-year-old daughter around. Personally, I wouldn’t be able to handle my little girls seeing me like that. Not even if they were 13. But then again, everyone handles things differently, of course. Greetings, Madelene

  7. Liesseling #27

    Chantie, yes, she can be there if she wants to. I also hope that she’ll develop a good bond with her little brother because a 13-year age gap is quite big, of course. She’s said that she’ll be with me until I go into labor, then she’ll go to the hallway. But we’ll see how she feels by then. She’s pretty open about it.

  8. jessie95 #28

    I was wondering if I wanted my mom there because my husband might not have liked that, but I decided to ask if she wanted to come, and she felt honored. For my husband, it’s also more comfortable because he gets support from my mom, and I’m never alone if he just wants to take a quick walk or smoke a cigarette or can’t handle it for a moment.

    Fortunately, my mom and my husband get along well, and I think it’s great that my mom wants to be there.

  9. Irma 1987 #29

    I actually never asked either.
    Maybe she thought it was an honor, but she called quickly enough with just the two of us.

    My mother-in-law always says you can call your mom if you want.
    Even though I have a good relationship with her, she surely understands that I wouldn’t want that and absolutely not—it’s a mother-in-law, not your mom.

  10. jessie95 #30

    I’ll be honest, I wouldn’t lose sleep over it if my mother-in-law happened to be around for whatever reason.

    I love my mother-in-law like my own mother.
    She just shouldn’t be checking between my legs when I’m giving birth—no one, not my husband, and not my mother either, hahaha.

  11. Irma 1987 #31

    At that point, it doesn't matter, Jessie. It all works out fine.

    Even if the whole shopping mall is watching when she arrives

  12. jessie95 #32

    Hahaha, I'm so curious! I still have a few months to prepare myself.

  13. bel Guest #33

    Haha Jessie, why shouldn't your man be able to look between your legs when you're giving birth? I assume he's seen that part of you before.. And isn't it also very special for a guy to witness his child being born?

  14. jessie95 #34

    Haha, he'll get traumatized and never see it the same again. Hahahahaha. And I'm sure he doesn't want to see it either; he doesn't have a very strong stomach.

    I can handle it fine; I always watch "One Born Every Minute" and you see everything there.

    But like Irma already said, I think I won't care about anything at that moment as long as I'm giving birth.

  15. bel Guest #35

    Hahaha. OK I get it. Well, my partner was just watching down there, and the worst part was that I kept feeling this strong urge to push. I told the three nurses or whatever they were the whole time that I felt like I had to poop, "No, it just feels like that because it's your pushing urge since the baby is coming." Well, it was my first birth, but I really did feel a pushing urge coming from my butt hahaha. And sure enough, I was allowed to push, and the first thing that came out in front of all those people was poop! That wasn't exactly how I imagined it would be.. But apparently, they thought it was the most normal thing in the world. Well, they've seen a thousand different pee-pees and poop-pees in their work, so this wasn't special to them haha. And my partner was also very calm about it; he's naturally pretty laid-back in those situations and had already read up on the possibility. The nurses quickly cleaned me up while I was still in the pushing position because the baby could come out at any moment, and my husband even helped by pulling the mat from under my butt. Since no one was worried about the poop (which was gone in a minute anyway) and they were only focused on the baby, my embarrassment quickly faded. At moments like these, you realize that it's all very normal and you really don't feel embarrassed; the focus is entirely on the baby you need to push out haha. No matter how many people are around or what's happening, it all goes by, it happens so fast, and it burns down there! The only thing I thought was to get that baby out. And before you know it, she's in your arms, and you've forgotten everything, even the pain. Just a normal birth for them

  16. jessie95 #36

    It's wonderful to read that everything felt so familiar and that you didn't feel ashamed of your own. Really super.
    I'm not really into labor yet, that'll come later.

  17. bel Guest #37

    Haha yeah sorry, I just typed out a whole story right away. I just wanted to say what Irma indeed says, at that moment you don't care about any of it anymore, right haha. I still have to go in 3 months, secretly hoping I won't have to poop anymore.. Wishing you lots of luck with your delivery too!

  18. jessie95 #38

    Haha good luck in advance, and I hope she doesn't poop either

  19. kruimel #39

    Hahahaha funny to read Bel..! I also said when the contractions started: "aaaaagh darling, I need to poop!" My boyfriend finds it a really funny story to tell at parties and stuff

  20. Figaroa #40

    No thanks, my mom is very restless and I can't handle that at the moment.

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