Waiting for a miscarriage

Hey sweetheart, I had an IUD in April 2016 and a spontaneous miscarriage in January 2017.

During the IUD, they found out at the second ultrasound that the baby's heart had already stopped beating for a while. I chose a D&C because it didn't look like it would come naturally, and I'd been carrying it for weeks already, so that's why...

The spontaneous miscarriage was pretty much like your story. I had doubts from the positive test onwards; something "didn't feel right" but I couldn't put my finger on it. I was supposed to have the first ultrasound at 8 weeks, and two days before, I suddenly had pink spotting, so I thought, "See, it's happening!" But then it stopped. I waited for the ultrasound, and my gut feeling was confirmed: an empty gestational sac. The midwife expected that seeing the ultrasound would be the signal for my body to start the miscarriage, and that's what happened two days later. However, the gestational sac didn't detach until five days later, so there was a lot of bleeding until then, because once it's out, the bleeding decreases significantly.

Talk to your midwife about the choices you have, and especially choose what feels most comfortable for you. Do you want to wait for your body to resolve it on its own? Then do that, same for medication or D&C. There's no right or wrong here! Lots of strength, girl.

Hi, what a sad thing but I totally understand! With my first pregnancy, I had a spontaneous miscarriage at just under 8 weeks. It started with mild cramps, then pink discharge, terrible cramps at night (like contractions), and in the morning bright red blood with clots. They confirmed it that day at the hospital. A week later for a check-up, and as I thought, the embryo was still there. I got pills to insert, but it took another week for the embryo to pass. I chose to avoid a D&C (which the gynecologist fully supported), but if anything was still there at the final check-up 3 weeks later, it would obviously have to be done. You can wait a bit, but make sure you're closely monitored and take action in good time. Good luck, girl!

Hi Heart!

That's so awful that you have to go through this, bah.. I want to wish you lots of strength first.

Last year, at the end of November, I also had a miscarriage. The first ultrasound showed a beautiful heartbeat, but unfortunately, at the 10-week scan, the heartbeat had stopped. The midwife asked me what I wanted; whether to wait for it to pass naturally or make an appointment with a gynecologist to discuss the options. I chose to get rid of it immediately. Sounds really blunt, but only then could I give it a place! In the hospital, they indeed gave me pills to induce the miscarriage, which I was a bit apprehensive about since it always went wrong for my mother. Unfortunately, it did for me too. With me, a "bit" remained, causing me to keep bleeding and eventually have to go to the hospital urgently for a curettage. The curettage, on the other hand, was a relief; once I woke up from the anesthesia, it was "over" and the bleeding has mostly stopped.

Make the choice that feels right for you, that's what's most important. It's all bad enough! A big hug

Hi,

I don't know if it really counts, but I had an early miscarriage at 5.5 weeks in March.
After a week, the blood test showed that my hCG levels were dropping, so I knew a miscarriage was coming. I knew from Monday that something wasn't right, and I got the final news on Wednesday. It was really sad. On Thursday, I went for a walk, completely worked up, and ran 17 km in one go out of frustration. When I got home, the bleeding had started. I was very relieved that everything had resolved itself naturally, and 2 months later, I was pregnant again
Wishing you lots of strength.

Sending you lots of strength for the coming days. I had a miscarriage myself in September; the baby had already stopped developing after two weeks, and I found out because of a little bit of spotting. I had it confirmed and got pills. With me, it had already started a bit (more bleeding and cramps). With the pills, it was over in 3-4 hours The only good thing was that it was behind me, so I could slowly start thinking about the future again. I didn't dare to have a D&C, and afterward, I'm glad it went the way it did with the pills. I found it a very emotionally heavy experience, the moment it really happened. I wish you lots of strength for the coming days. You can always talk to your midwife about your doubts.

Hi sweetheart, what a tough message. I had a miscarriage a few years back too. Probably around 6-7 weeks, but in my case, the gestational sac kept growing and it didn't look like my body was going to pass it on its own. At 9.5 weeks, we decided to go for a D&C.

I found the whole thing a really intense process, especially because my body still felt so pregnant. That's why I chose the D&C. I wanted it over with, to process it, and to start fresh.

Hi dearest, my first miscarriage was at 7 weeks (no heartbeat on the ultrasound). I decided to wait a week, hoping it would pass naturally. But no, the symptoms got worse and the gestational sac kept growing. So I took the pills, which wasn't a nice experience for me. Intense cramps and blood flowing out like I was urinating. Eventually, it did come out. On the follow-up, some tissue had remained. I got another injection to induce contractions. I bled for weeks after that, and eventually, I had a D&C. That went smoothly for me.
With the second miscarriage, I opted for a D&C right away.
But it's different for everyone. My niece was helped quickly with the pills, short bleeding, short cramps, and everything was gone. And with her second miscarriage, she had a D&C and suffered a lot afterwards.
Mentally, it remains very heavy, and I was very, very deep down. Especially when it happened twice in a row. Hopefully, you can close this chapter soon and have a positive story again soon!

Dear Heart,

It's probably already in motion due to continuous bleeding and blood clots. I hope you get clarity soon for your girl. And if not, definitely reach out and use a method to induce labor.

If your symptoms get worse, I'm afraid that means the gestational sac is still growing. Hopefully, you'll get your referral soon. Good luck, girl!

It’s like the other girls say, you can only start processing it once it’s behind you. Although the sadness remains. I hope you feel better soon. Don’t lose hope. Good luck!

Indeed, processing can only begin once it's behind you. Right now you're so stuck... The baby is still there, you're still pregnant, and secretly you're still holding on to hope even though you know it's not there. A miscarriage is really heavy. And so many women go through this, but there's still such a taboo around it.

Strength on Tuesday. For me, it was a short conversation where I had to make the choice myself: curettage or pills. I could go straight to the pharmacy. That was really nice for me at that moment. I also managed to arrange that I could come in on the same day, so maybe that's why the conversation was so short.

Totally, it's nice to have a date, sweetheart! Keep us posted?

Besje, yeah, that taboo should really be broken by now. You rarely hear anyone talk about it until you've experienced it yourself, and then suddenly stories come from all sides. It shouldn't be like that.

Anne is indeed a pretty short conversation; you get to hear the options, pros and cons, and that's it.

I assume you'll definitely get that beforehand, at least with a curettage.