My husband doesn't get it at all!!

What a hassle it all is.
I guess I'm lucky, I'm pregnant with the third one.
We have a little girl of just over 2.5 years and a little girl of 16 months.
My husband is only home on weekends.
During the week he's away day and night. He's a professional soldier.
I do everything alone during the week.
Taking care of the kids, housework, groceries, everything.
And I also work 2 days a week.
When my husband is home he pays a lot of attention to the girls and I have my hands free for other things.
When I work weekends my husband does everything around the house.
If I'm free we split it up.
Is it sometimes difficult and heavy.
There are weeks that there are 4 laundry baskets with clean laundry because I don't have the energy, yes they are there and will come more often.
If he comments on that I think he'll get the laundry thrown at his head.
He weighs that he has it somewhat easier in that regard so he folds the laundry away.
He also thinks he had it very hard when he was alone with the girls for 9 hours.
Then I think, oh my, 9 hours alone.
But then I also think, well, he's not used to it as much, he has no rhythm, I do.
They do their best I think.
greetings aks

My husband just doesn't see (or refuses to see) what needs to be done around the house. But if I ask him to do something, he does it (with healthy reluctance). When I get comments because mister works 40 hours, I list everything that needs to be done in a household, including washing, ironing, cleaning windows, caring for pets, vacuuming, mopping, cooking, etc. And I ask him who he expects to do all that. And that I also work 24 to 32 hours a week alongside my pregnancy. Then he reluctantly admits that he indeed expects that from me. To which my response is that I expect it shouldn't be much effort for him to occasionally do something to help me out and gladly without complaining. And if he keeps complaining that he can do it all himself and I don't lift a finger, then he does back down. Besides that, he is sweet, but in terms of household chores, he's very spoiled by his mother, and it takes time to adjust.

Hi dear Ana, I guess you've already given birth by now? How did everything else go during your pregnancy?
I really relate to your story and get the same comments. I'm doing okay in my own skin, but of course not when it comes to these remarks. I occasionally spend a few days at my mom's place to get some peace and quiet without hearing things like "you've done absolutely nothing today, why isn't there food on the table when I come home from work, you really need to get off the couch."
I'm in my first trimester, which is why I'm extremely tired. I've explained multiple times that it'll get better... asked him to read up on it. But he absolutely refuses to do that. The situation has improved a bit here now, although I still hear that I'm on the couch for too long. He's starting to read up on it now, so hopefully things will get better.