Forum 2nd trimester

pregnant with the third and after 2 boys a secret wish for a girl...

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  1. Cindy Guest #21

    I'm now 20 weeks pregnant with my third son. Until last week, I was completely convinced it was going to be a girl. I'd wanted a girl for my two other sons too. But then last week they told me it was going to be a boy. At that moment, my world fell apart. As much as I hated the idea, I couldn't hold back my tears, and I was incredibly angry at my husband for giving me another son. After two days of feeling depressed, I'm feeling better now. My two boys are so happy about having another brother, and the rest of the family is happy too. He's healthy, and that's all that matters. And I know what's coming.

  2. madelene #22

    I myself am a mother of 2 little girls, sweet as can be, but I always had the wish for a son.
    When I was pregnant for the first time and found out I was expecting a little girl, I was happy about it because my man had a son from his previous marriage, so I thought it would be nice for him especially.
    But deep down in my heart, I knew I wanted at least 1 son.
    So when my daughter was almost 1, I decided to go for a 2nd child, hoping in the back of my mind for a little boy.
    I got pregnant again quite quickly, and when the 20-week ultrasound came, I asked, "Do you know what it will be? Can you already tell?"
    She said, "I see 2 testicles, it's going to be a girl."
    I still remember very well how I felt at that moment, sadness, a blow to the face.
    My throat started to tighten, frozen from shock.
    Are you really sure?
    "Yes, I really can't say anything else, you're going to have a girl."

  3. madelene #23

    Tears followed as we walked to the car. But I immediately tried to turn my emotions into acceptance because I knew that your belly baby picks up and takes over every emotion from the mother, and I didn't want my belly baby to feel unwelcome.
    So I said to my belly baby:
    "It's okay, Mama has accepted that you're a girl. Mama is happy with you; you're welcome.
    You're perfect just as you are, and I'm looking forward to your arrival."
    Then

  4. madelene #24

    When my daughter was born, I immediately understood my disappointment. I was over the moon right away. She was also a very easy baby, exactly by the book. She fell asleep quickly, only cried for hunger or a dirty diaper. She was easy to soothe. My eldest daughter people already found easy they said you don't get one like that again. And that happened even easier. But well I understand your wish unfortunately that is sometimes still taboo. Greetings Madelene

  5. Roos Guest #25

    Hi ladies, I'm expecting my second child. I already have a little boy and now I'm having another boy. Oh, I was so sad when I heard that. I know it's about the baby and I'll love him with all my heart, but I really wished for a girl. I feel like I'm truly a girl mom. But unfortunately, nature decides in this case. Luckily, we want 3 kids and we still have 1 chance ;-). I'm not going to let this one slip by. I did some research online and saw that in other countries you can choose the gender of your baby. Has anyone tried this?

  6. madelene #26

    I’ve heard of it, but even though I’d love to have a son, I’d never do it myself because I believe you shouldn’t try to control things.
    For example, it’s not by chance that nature gives you daughters or someone else sons.
    That way, there’s balance. Otherwise, for instance, too many boys would be born if many women wanted boys, and too few girls, so the Earth wouldn’t be in balance anymore.
    That’s why I’d never do it.
    Greetings, Madelene

  7. Catharina Guest #27

    So glad to read that I'm not the only one. Recently found out we're expecting a third son, but I had such a strong feeling it would be a girl. My world fell apart, even though I know how ridiculous that feeling is. Why can't I be happy about having a third son? The hardest part is that my husband doesn't understand. I just want some support. I'm sure I'll get used to the idea and once baby #3 is here, I'll be over the moon. For now, I just need time to adjust to the thought that those cozy mom-daughter moments won't happen. Even though I see myself as a girl mom. I'll have to get over it and enjoy having three healthy boys instead. Health is what matters most anyway.

  8. Monkey #28

    Same here!
    We’re really hoping for a girl too, but whatever it is, we can’t wait to meet them.
    With our first pregnancy, we hoped for a girl too, and we ended up with a big son. But he’s our little heart thief, we wouldn’t want to miss him for anything

  9. Karin Guest #29

    I'm so happy with our twins! They're both girls. It's my first pregnancy. I didn't have a preference, and I wasn't really trying to get pregnant—it was welcome but not planned. I didn't care if it was a boy or a girl.
    Now that it turned out to be twins, two girls, I'm just super happy. I never thought it could even be twins. Two girls, and I'm happy with that.

  10. Mamavanbijna3 Guest #30

    Currently I'm pregnant with my third son.. And as much as I want to accept this, I can't.. This pregnancy was so different from the other two. That I really hoped for a girl.. Since I was 15, I've been dreaming of a girl, fantasizing about her hair color and the cute little dresses. I already have a name picked out, but I have to let this dream go, because we're having another boy and I can't get used to it.. I catch myself getting really unhappy about it.. I can't talk to anyone about it either and I feel so unhappy and ashamed.. Any tips or advice? I don't know anymore..

  11. Karin Guest #31

    You definitely don't need to feel ashamed. Try to think that it had to be this way and not for nothing. A son is what it was meant to be.
    As for the advantages, I think he can help you a lot later on and support you during tough times because it's usually the case that boys feel more connected to their mothers and help them a lot later in times of need.
    Daughters usually feel more connected to their fathers.
    Have a nice evening, Karin.

  12. Mare Guest #32

    Hi everyone,

    I'm pregnant with my third child too. After having two boys, I really wished for a girl—I even dreamed about it! But during my 15-week ultrasound, we saw a boy after all. I was overjoyed to see such a healthy baby!! Still, I shed a few tears the next day. Not because of this baby, not at all! But because I had to say goodbye to the idea of ever having a mother-daughter bond, and I wondered what a daughter of mine and my husband would be like. My husband found this quite normal; he also had to get used to the fact that he'd never have a father-daughter bond. And again, this has nothing to do with this little boy, because I'm absolutely thrilled about his arrival and can't wait to meet him. There's already so much love for this third little one!! The thought of having three boys makes me incredibly happy.

  13. Anonymous Guest #33

    Don't feel ashamed at all.
    I can really understand how you feel.
    We are pregnant with our 2nd child and I was convinced it would be a girl this time, the ultrasound even showed a boy. No matter how happy I am with the pregnancy, I still secretly feel bummed that it's not a girl. Around us, the 2nd neighbors are both expecting a girl and I catch myself being quite jealous, and I feel really bad about that because I'm totally crazy about our son and wouldn't miss him for any gold, which of course also applies to our upcoming child..but still I keep feeling sorry about it. So don't think you're weird if you feel a bit sad about it for a while, I'm sure more people feel that way but it seems like a taboo to talk openly about it.

  14. Roos #34

    I'm pregnant with my fourth child now. I have 3 boys and I'd really like a girl this time. My gut feeling says 100% girl, but I'll find out tomorrow. I don't know how I'll react if it's a boy again. My boys would really like a little brother. But I really, really want a girl.

  15. Anonymous Guest #35

    How exciting, Roos! I'm cheering for you!!!
    I'm curious...

  16. Roos #36

    Well, it's a boy. The boys were so happy. As long as he's healthy, you don't really choose. I'm already used to boys anyway.

  17. lily #37

    I also had a wish for a girl from the very first pregnancy. But nature decided otherwise, and I'm now pregnant with our third son. I had to swallow my disappointment and let go of the dream of having a girl. But now that I'm further along, that disappointment is long gone, and I'm just incredibly proud of having three sons!

  18. lily #38

    Of course, as long as it's healthy, that's what's most important. Roos, did you have a hard time with the fact that number 4 is also a boy? And what are the ages of your kids?

  19. Esra♡♥ #39

    Woooow, after four girls here... (two from him, one from me, and one from us together) we'd really like a boy... well, my husband does... he's an Arab and they have the belief that they must have at least one son... but look, he only gets girls hahaha... If I were pregnant, I'd be sure it'd be another girl, but oh well... we don't decide ourselves, unfortunately... and that's a good thing too... otherwise there would be a very uneven distribution on earth. But I completely understand you girls... it's nice that we can chat about this here without being attacked right away.. And no, we're not ungrateful (I do get told that sometimes by couples who unfortunately have to wait longer for a child) we're all people who also sometimes dream or fantasize about what a mother-daughter or mother-son bond would be like if you're not used to it, right???

  20. Roos #40

    I had a hard time with it because I really wanted a girl after 3 boys. My oldest is 16, the middle one 14, and the youngest is 10 years old. They were so happy when they heard it was another boy. I had a feeling it would be a girl because everything felt so different. My brother has 3 daughters and just had a son. It would be lovely if I could have a girl after 3 boys. I'm so alone at home with 4 guys, and one more on the way. I do have 4 sisters, but we don't have such a good connection anymore. I'd really like a girl as a friend. But yeah, you don't get to choose. I think I'll try for another baby, either right after this delivery or a year later. If it's a girl, great, but if not, he'll just have a friend for my little one, who already has 3 big brothers.

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