Don't let them get to you.

I get it, Jantine. With the first one, I didn't want to breastfeed. I just didn't feel right about it. Well, I know better now! All the things you write about when you bottle-feed made me feel guilty towards my child. Am I such a bad mother, I thought. Now I'm pregnant again and I'm going to try breastfeeding to avoid those feelings of guilt....

Great topic!
Totally agree with you, I think it's ridiculous to go around looking for it!!

I think it's all not that bad anyway. At least I've never experienced it myself. Now I'm pregnant with my first and want to try breastfeeding. If it doesn't work out, I'll switch to the bottle. And no matter what they say, you should stand by your decision. I've worked as a maternity care nurse myself and yes, we tried to promote breastfeeding. But if people wanted to give the bottle, that was fine too. Then we accepted their choice and didn't make any drama about them being a bad mother. I've often had mothers who really wanted to but couldn't... too little milk production, or due to breast surgery. And I could go on like this. But if these mothers decided to switch, we supported them and accepted this too. You have to be 100% behind trying to breastfeed. If you're not, then don't do it because it will only lead to frustration... and feelings of helplessness. A child will grow up fine with the bottle too. The reason I choose breastfeeding is purely for the contact and because it's always handy. But if it doesn't work out, I really won't worry. You have that contact with the bottle too, and a bottle is made for that.

What I find strange is if you decide to stop and don't just ask for advice at the consultation bureau or from your GP. My experience is that they help you and give advice on what you can do. Someone from a store isn't trained for that. They say what they've learned and yes, to promote breastfeeding, they say it's the best... but I wouldn't give an explanation either. I buy a pack of formula and that's it. I also make sure I have formula in stock if breastfeeding doesn't work... a hungry baby is the worst thing there is, and if I feel like, for example, at night my milk hasn't come in yet, then the little one will definitely get some formula... it's also about how you deal with it yourself. Don't stress... there are really worse things... breast or bottle, they'll grow up fine anyway...

Kaatje, I agree with you .

Everyone wants the best for their child... some want to try breastfeeding, while others use bottle feeding...

You just want one thing: to raise your child big and healthy

I also feel that there are mothers who are just too lazy to choose breastfeeding or who complain about it being so exhausting. Come on, those few months for your baby, can't you make that effort? Being a mother means sacrificing yourself for your child. My breasts hurt, my daughter pulled hard, and of course, I spent the whole day dealing with it. Sure, it was tiring, but I didn't stop. I pushed through the pain because my girl enjoyed breastfeeding so much, and for her, I did it in the end. My mother always taught me that pure motherhood means sacrificing yourself for your child's health. Breast milk is the best milk; they should even mention that on powdered baby milk ads. You can imagine. Breast milk is always at the right temperature and responds to your baby. When your baby is hungry, your breasts automatically produce milk according to the baby's hunger level. No fuss and no measuring with powdered milk. And did you know that breast milk has fore milk and hind milk? That means the first thing that comes out of your breast is fore milk, which is for your baby's thirst, and then hind milk comes out, which is for your baby's hunger. It contains very healthy fats and is thicker. Fore milk is thinner, which you don't get with powdered milk. And isn't it sad to deny your baby that just to make things easier for yourself? Greetings, Sanne.

Just a quick response: NOT EVERYONE can breastfeed. You make everyone who can't breastfeed feel guilty. Modern formula milk has all the nutrients your baby needs, otherwise they wouldn't sell it. And regarding 'healthy' breast milk: it contains all the germs and bacteria the mother has, which you just pass on to your little one. Mother sick, child sick. Veeeery much better!?. I was self-employed and simply couldn't breastfeed. I can already picture myself in my shop with a breast pump attached to my chest. Show a little respect for mothers. Not everyone is keen on breastfeeding.

I grew up on breast milk and my own daughter did too, without any problems. And as for weight... what does it matter, they're eating anyway? Bottle-fed babies even sleep longer. I can definitely compare here in the family: mine slept straight through for 6 hours, and my sister's slept 3 hours, and she was already awake to suckle again. A calm sleep is also very healthy for your baby.

And then I think it's only normal that you should be able to find information about this here. We don't live in the Middle Ages anymore where everyone is kept ignorant because the government finds it convenient. I also think this is the best place to bring it up.

Hooray for Jantine! !

well well callie i don't think it's normal with all respect how you write i see myself standing in a store saying that so something about you i find it very bad that you use that as an excuse not to have to breastfeed i put my children's health first do you think i'm going to worry about how i look i'd rather have a milk machine and a child with healthy food than worry about how it looks and deprive her of that healthy mother's milk that's the last thing i think about how i look as a breastfeeding mother people will respect me more because i think about my child like this it actually looks beautiful and calming people aren't used to it anymore even though it's natural and out of love for your child what i was also so proud of is that every weight she gained in the first months was only from my mother's milk not thanks to the bottle but thanks to my own milk that gives such a special feeling she grew up completely on my milk and your bond is stronger with your baby because she smells your scent every time she drinks she recognizes that scent from the womb so unconsciously she knows every time that she's getting her drink from you not someone else who might also give the bottle no completely mother and daughter moment she knows when she cries for food that she can only get that from you and a bottle baby also sometimes sees another face when he or she gets the bottle breastfeeding is for everyone you just have to have the patience for it and drink a lot of water for milk production and practice latching well but that's exactly why it's too exhausting for some mothers and then they give up if you pay attention you'll hear in the nutrilon ads that they clearly say mother's milk is the best food for your child then they're allowed to advertise their powder factory milk because mother's milk is also the best milk they can't get around that but they also want to earn money and therefore advertise their powdered milk greetings sanne

And you should know how often I sat on a terrace with Shemene and a blanket in front of her, breastfeeding her just fine. Greetings, Sanne.

and Callie, the healthy fats and minerals in breast milk are really not in formula milk, no matter how hard they try to replicate it. If you breastfeed, your baby is protected from illnesses for about 5 months; it has a good immune system. No factory-made milk can match that. Formula is very heavy and powerful, but breast milk is perfectly tailored to your baby. I can later proudly say to my daughters: you grew up on my milk. Greetings, Sanne

Oh yeah, what I also wanted to mention is that in the first months with your baby, it’s not about you—it’s (hopefully) all about your baby. So how can you stress about how you look while breastfeeding?

so you're saying you could serve people with a baby at your breast?? Good luck. It's not about my body, I didn't say anything about that. You're just taking everything out of context.

Let's just keep in mind that everyone has a different opinion and always chooses the best for their own child.

There’s some truth to both sides, but Sanne, you act like you’re a monster and a bad mother if you don’t breastfeed! It’s a choice. I breastfed for 2 weeks and then it really wasn’t working for me. My little boy kept losing weight and crying. My breasts were almost falling off from the pain. I was exhausted, and every feed took 2 hours, and then he still wasn’t satisfied!! I was a wreck and became grumpy, and in that way, you’re not a nice mother either, and I couldn’t enjoy my son. Switched to bottle feeding, and after a day, I had a different child. He slept well, was cheerful, and suddenly cried much less! And I definitely don’t think it’s a problem to be tired, but not sleeping is a different story. You can push yourself to keep going, but sometimes it just doesn’t work, and then you’re not a nice mother either! And my child really has a bond with me, even though I stopped breastfeeding. My little boy smiles and radiates when I’m around or pick him up. Of course, breastfeeding is healthy and beautiful if you can do it, but you also need to realize that sometimes it just can’t work! Every parent makes their own choice with the well-being of their child in mind, and we need to learn to respect each other’s choices! I think it’s beautiful when mothers breastfeed, and I also understand when mothers bottle feed!

You can definitely combine them, though. It depends on when you feed her or him. Personally, I just think it's a pretty far-fetched reason to not breastfeed. This is just your question about feeding, and by the way, let's make sure we understand each other properly. What do you mean by "feeding"? And another important thing: you accuse me of taking things out of context, but you immediately wrote at the very beginning of your first post that I cause mothers who breastfeed to feel guilty. Well, that seems to be the case with you. You probably feel attacked while I'm just sharing my opinion in general about how I feel about it. That says more about you. I didn't say you can do anything about it if you have absolutely no milk, but most women find it easier to use a bottle and think breastfeeding is just a lot of hassle. About those mothers, I say...

melis1606 2 weeks is too little to get used to feeding. It's a pity you stopped, but I respect the effort you put in for those 2 weeks. There are women who stop after just 1 day, so at least your baby got healthy food from you for the first 2 weeks. Better than nothing at all. But I just wanted to say that I also had pain. I got through it with the thought that I have to keep going for my baby. And at first, my milk also had to get going. But by drinking lots of glasses of water, I naturally produced more milk. That takes some time, and the more often you put your baby to the breast, the more milk your breasts produce. Many women make the mistake of thinking they should have milk right away. No, that's not how it works. It takes time to get going, and that takes time. You also really need to drink lots of glasses of water a day for milk production. But anyway, thanks for your response, melis.

And I think it's great that you held out for at least 2 weeks. There are women who don't even start. Best wishes, Sanne

Oh yes, what I forgot to mention is that breastfeeding is also a lot of work for your baby. Your baby has to pull quite hard to drink your milk, and that's also necessary for milk production. My daughter always fell asleep dead tired and content after drinking. That's also an advantage of breastfeeding. Your baby gets tired from drinking because it's hard work for your baby to get the milk from the breasts. I just wanted to share that. Greetings, Sanne

Jantiene, I think you're just jealous of moms who choose healthy breastfeeding for their baby and actually do it. It's well known that breastfeeding is simply the best start you can give your child, whether you like it or not. It's also quite logical, of course, since it's natural, while other things are made by people in factories. Nothing beats natural. By the way, did you know that if you breastfeed, your baby doesn't need vaccinations until 6 or 5 months because they're protected against diseases for that long? I breastfed both my kids—they're grown up now, a son of 5 and a daughter of 3—but I gave them both breast milk and only let them get vaccinated at 6 months. I still went to the child health clinic for growth and weight checks, though. Greetings, Rianna.

hi manon, that you didn't eat healthy and had no energy for it because you have a crying baby, that's possible of course, a crying baby is very heavy, i myself was a crying baby, my mother had a hard time with it, that's also one of the reasons i was 13 years apart from my sister, she couldn't see a baby anymore, she was cured right away, they told me, but anyway, i'm drifting off from my story, what i wanted to say, eating healthy is not a matter of time but more a choice, you always have time to eat healthy, the question is, do you find it worth it to choose for that? of course you have to pay attention to your diet if you are breastfeeding, it's like in the womb, what you eat or drink comes into your milk, i find it truly terrible with all respect, but i really find it terrible when i hear women in my environment say, i'd rather give bottle feeding because i have to let go so much, i miss my coffee too much. sorry, but then it's clear that those women put their own needs above the health of their children?