Vrije bevalling (freebirthing)

Hi!

Why did you go to the hospital 3 times instead of trying once at home? I know there's a whole organization advocating for birth freedom. I expect that if you search well on Google, you'll come across them. I don't know exactly what they're called right now.

Legally, I think they can't do that much. I don't think there's any law stating you're obligated to take care. There are alternative midwives who only "accompany" pregnancies and births; they can teach you everything you need to pay attention to.

Still, I think you'd be better off choosing a VBK (voluntary birth care) and a home birth. You get some support if you need it. You can even catch your own baby and do everything alone with your partner. She's only there to guide things smoothly and intervene if necessary. Discuss this early on in your relationship. If the VBK doesn't support it, you can look for another one.

You're not obligated to anything. Doctors like to rely on what they've learned and what's easy for them. But you're truly in charge of your own body. If you don't want something, you really don't have to.

I'm curious what you'll ultimately choose. Good luck!

Thanks for your replies. My previous labor, I wanted to do at home, but that drove me crazy too. The midwife was catching up on her paperwork, and there was also an intern along for the ride. On top of that, the postpartum care team was called and kept hovering around the whole time. The commotion at home just didn't sit right with me, so I ended up deciding to go to the hospital anyway because I didn't feel comfortable there either. As a result, my labor didn't progress well. My first birth had to be in the hospital because my son turned out to be small. This was also the case here; he was dysmature. So, I was required to give birth in the hospital for my second pregnancy too. My second son was also small, but during the pregnancy, it was still within normal limits I just don't have big babies. All three are small, but they were born healthy. I always get a bit tired of all the fuss about them being too small... At 1.64 m and 50 kg (before pregnancy), I'm not tall either, and my partner is 1.76 m, so he's not that tall either. So I don't expect 8-pound babies. I'd rather have a 5-pounder and actually find that really lovely.

I'm currently going to the hospital for check-ups. I thought I'd end up there in the end anyway, but I'm increasingly feeling like I don't want anyone present during the birth. Though it would make sense to switch to a midwife. I think I'd do it myself and only call the midwife at the very last moment, so she'd either arrive just in time or just a bit late. That way, I avoid all the fuss during the birth, but I still have someone to fall back on if things don't go smoothly.

Hi Wendy,
I gave birth to my eldest very quickly. For a first-time mom, the midwife said it only took 4 hours, and after three pushes, she was there.
My second birth was even faster. I already had 8 cm dilation when the midwife arrived.
I guess I have a high pain threshold.
By the way, I had a contraction in the car on the way to the hospital because I had chosen to give birth in a hospital.
My husband thought it was a more comfortable idea.

When I was in the car, I was having really intense contractions. I had to barely hold back. When we got to the hospital, I said I couldn't hold it anymore, I need to push now. She said, "Wait a moment, ma'am." I said, "No, I can't." Then she looked shocked because I already had enough dilation to push, and after two pushes, she was out. The midwife was surprised how fast it went and asked why I didn't choose a home birth. She advised me to consider a home birth for any future children if it goes this fast. So it was close to either giving birth at home or definitely in the car. But personally, I think women can absolutely give birth alone; we just don't trust our own abilities or our own feminine strength anymore. Greetings, Madelene.

No one is obligated to seek medical help for themselves (though they are for others). But I’d never give birth without professional assistance. The risk of something going wrong is too high.