After 8 months, still not pregnant

Hi!
Oh my, I'm so glad to read your story! Now I don't feel alone anymore.
I'm going through exactly the same thing as you described. We've been trying for 8 months now, for our first baby, but without success... I'm starting to think something is wrong with me. Everyone around me gets pregnant, but it doesn't work for me...
I've been doing ovulation tests for a few months now, after a colleague told me she got pregnant right after testing for just one month. Turns out I also have irregular cycles, because the tests aren't clear. I never know when my ovulation is.
My husband hates that I'm following it so closely; he says it won't work because I'm too focused on it...
Ugh, it's tough like this...

I'm new but I'd like to share my story anyway. Other forums are inactive or I don't really feel at home there, so I'm hoping to get some tips here. I already have kids, so nothing to complain about, but with the third one, it just won't happen. We've been trying for over a year now and haven't found any cause yet.

My cycle is usually between 30 and 35 days.
I use ovulation tests so I know exactly when my ovulation is. The test line doesn't have to be noticeably darker than the control line, as long as it's at least as dark.
I never used contraception between my pregnancies.
When you want it, every month of waiting feels like one month too long.

It's so nice that this forum exists. My husband and I have also been trying for 8 months now, and the frustration is really high. But it's such a relief to see that we're not the only ones. I mostly feel regret now that I didn't start sooner. My husband and I have been together for 10 years and have been married for almost 4 years. My husband started hinting two years ago that he really wanted to become a dad. But I still wanted to travel and party, and the pandemic right after the lockdown didn't help with my plans either. It took me longer to realize whether I was really ready for kids, and I missed all the fun parties and festivals my friends were going to. So I waited a long time until we were completely ready. But now that it's taking so long, I feel so much regret. I'm completely obsessed with getting pregnant, and it seems like I always feel stressed because of it. And if there's even a small setback at work or something, it's already the straw that breaks the camel's back because my bucket is already full from the stress of trying to get pregnant. I've also always wanted to be a young mom in my life, but now I see that dream slipping away. I wish we had started sooner. Maybe I wouldn't have felt completely ready yet, but at least the pressure would have been lower. Because now I really, really want to get pregnant. Every period is terrible again. My husband and I did take a break for a month in April from trying because we really didn't want a baby in December, and because we needed a mental break. It felt very strange to take a break from something we want so much. But it did us a lot of good, and I found my old self again. Now we'll just keep trying hopefully. I have the app "Flo" that helps me track my cycle. I recommend that app to everyone. I wish you all strength and success in trying to get pregnant. And I hope that once I'm pregnant, I can forget this stressful time.

I need to take a step back and clear my head too. It feels weird to do this because your stories all deserve support, and here I come with the same old story again. I wish I could give you my full attention, but the truth is I’m mostly dealing with my own misery.

We’re now in round 10. But we told the doctor it was round 12. I just couldn’t take it anymore. Last week, the tests started. So far, nothing special. I don’t think they’ll find anything either, since we already have one healthy son.

My cycle varies between 24 and 27 days. Last month, suddenly 28. I really thought it had worked. I’m now on day 26 and had high hopes because I felt nothing. Until tonight. My back and belly, a very light nagging feeling. I know enough... another month didn’t work out.

This moment is exhausting. Not being on your period yet, so having that 1% hope, but also feeling or knowing it’s coming. I hate my body right now. Fuck nature. It doesn’t do what it’s supposed to do. Sometimes I deliberately use an early test to decide when to brace myself for the blow. I hoped that would make it easier. But no. I’m just trying to fool myself. Saying I feel nothing or that I’m pregnant-like symptoms like sore breasts. But it’s not true. If it had gone like last time, we’d have a new miracle child in our arms by now. Could someone just tell me if this will ever happen, or if I’ll have to carry this shadow for the rest of my life.

Hi Oli,
I really feel like I'm reading my own story. I'm also 29 and my partner is 30, and we've been trying to conceive for 8 months now. I had already stopped the pill three years ago and really thought I'd be pregnant within a month (my mom and sister were too). After 5 months, we started using ovulation tests and also stopped drinking alcohol (me) and both of us cut out caffeine. We went to the GP in November, and my partner's sperm was checked, and I was tested for chlamydia. Both came back negative. My partner's sperm is perfectly fine, and I'm negative for chlamydia. It's the same with my friends; every conversation is about kids, and it's driving me crazy. Same with family. I had hoped that after getting the negative results, I could just let go of everything, but I just can't. For the first 3 weeks, everything feels nice and hopeful, but when I get stomach cramps, I can only cry and fall into a negative spiral. I also avoid social activities as much as possible...
Does anyone have tips on how to stay hopeful, and can someone tell me that it's still possible to get pregnant, even after a year? Sometimes I really feel like calling the GP and asking if they can refer me to a gynecologist sooner because I'm so scared that something's wrong with me.

Kind regards, Josje

8 months does feel really long, but it's far from being a deviation. My mom told me she took a year without anything being wrong. Let that pressure go for now, it doesn't help. If it still doesn't work after a year, then you'll go to the GP. Now just hope it hits the next cycle.