Help

6 replies

ElkeDekock2 months ago

Hi everyone,

I have a few questions for you all. Actually, I feel quite insecure about myself and sometimes I'm not sure if I'm doing things right... I should just be convinced of my approach, but sometimes I'm not sure.

My baby's daily and feeding schedule looks like this:
6:55: Wake up. Give Omeprazole (needs to work for half an hour), get dressed, etc.
7:30: Bottle 1: 180 ml water, 6 scoops
8:30: Sleep until 11:00
11:00: Start vegetable porridge + bottle 150 ml, 5 scoops
12:30: Sleep until 15:00
15:00: Bottle 3
16:30: Sleep until 18:30
18:30: Bath
19:00: Bottle 4
20:00: Sleep until 22:15
22:30: Bottle 5
22:45: Sleep until 6:55

I have so many questions about this schedule haha.
- Is she sleeping too much?
- During her naps, she sometimes wakes up after 45 minutes, sometimes after an hour, sometimes not at all. I usually go back in to put her pacifier back in her mouth; she usually lies there with her eyes closed and then sleeps again for another 45 minutes, an hour, or until feeding. Is that okay? If she wasn't tired, wouldn't she just sleep longer anyway?
I follow the Ria Blom principle because Lili was a very restless baby at the beginning. So when she wakes up, she gets fed.
Lately, I notice that she drinks at 15:00 but is already yawning at 15:30? I've been trying to stretch this out recently (but maybe this is counterproductive and I should just accept that she needs a bit more sleep). I'm stretching it because I'm afraid she won't sleep through the night anymore, because until recently she always slept through, but lately I sometimes have to get up 5 times to put her pacifier back in (jump in?)

Can someone give me some advice please? I'm starting to feel a bit insecure now that she's having such a hard time at night, so I think she's sleeping too much during the day, but she's yawning after just half an hour? Maybe I should just let it be? It's not like she's suddenly swapping her day and night sleep. When I keep putting her back to sleep with her pacifier, both during the day and at night, I always have to wake her up for the feeding time anyway. So she is tired, I think. I'm quite a control freak and sometimes think that I'm imposing this schedule on her and that this might go against her natural pattern and that she might be overtired from sleeping too much haha help x

Replies

Maartje 2 months ago #2

How old is your baby? Not entirely unimportant.
I wouldn't look too hard for the solution to sleeping. One baby sleeps more than another. Do you wake her up for bottles, or does she wake up on her own? Do you always put her pacifier in right away? The health center told me it's good if the baby can get herself back to sleep. Suppose you give her the pacifier every time, then she won't be quiet until you give her the pacifier. I don't have personal experience with this because ours doesn't use a pacifier.
ElkeDekock started this 2 months ago #3

Maartje, thanks for your reply.
My baby is 18 weeks old.
So I shouldn't worry too much about sleeping. Eventually, when she has a daytime nap from 8:30 to 11, for example, and she wakes up 2 times, I have to wake her up anyway for the bottle.
I did teach her to put her pacifier back in her mouth, because at first it was only during the day since she used to sleep through the night before, and I thought it came from her sleeping lighter during the day, and didn't think it was a big deal to do, you know?
Maybe just a leap, she was also weaned not long ago, maybe she cries to sleep like that, maybe she just needs to learn it and get through the leap without me having to worry if she's sleeping too much during the day?
Falca 2 months ago #4

When I read it like this, your baby eats and sleeps fine as long as they follow the schedule. I think you're doing great.

A few restless nights can have various causes. Teething, not feeling well, a growth spurt, etc. Do you go to her right away at the first whimper or do you wait a bit? And when you go to her during the night, do you talk to her (make it cozy) or are you as quiet as possible? (By being as quiet as possible during the night and not making it cozy, but greeting her very cheerfully and cozily during the day, you teach babies that when it's dark, it's time for rest and thus sleep.)

Maybe you can try to gradually loosen up the schedule a bit. You'll notice that as your baby gets older, they need to sleep less often. Sometimes it's less but longer naps. Pay close attention to the signals your baby gives when they're getting tired; you'll know what they need. As long as they're alert and eating well, you don't need to worry about how much they're sleeping. They'll sleep when they need to.
ElkeDekock started this 2 months ago #5

Thanks for your reply, Falca.
I'm definitely already applying your tips. For example, last night she woke up at 2am, 4am, 5:30, 6:30... I always wait a little to see if she finds her sleep again, but I do go to her pretty quickly (any tips on this?). Then she lies there with her eyes closed. I don't say anything, don't look at her, just stay quiet, put her pacifier in her mouth, and she drifts off again. Finally, this morning at 6:55, she woke up enthusiastically. She always stretches and yawns deeply when she comes out of deep sleep. After the medication kicks in, she drinks around 7:20, but only 140ml out of 200ml (so it's not like she's crying at night from hunger; you can't really call it crying either, more like waking up and not being able to get back to sleep, which she could do before).
Finally at 7:30, a big yawn. I kept her awake a bit longer, but she started fussing quickly. According to her routine, she was back in her crib at 8:00 and is now still grumbling. I want to learn to follow her rhythm, but I find it so hard to read her. Because if she wakes up later, say after an hour, it's just like at night: she lies there with her eyes closed, and if you put her pacifier back in her mouth, she's back asleep. Before, she was hungry, but I don't think she had her bottle at 11am either. And if she suddenly wakes up fully, say at 9:30, I find that difficult because then she's only been awake for 1.5 hours (which is what babies that age can be awake for), but then it's 11am feeding time. What if I wake her up at 9:30 (if she's awake, it's just an example) and I wake her up, and then at 10am she's tired again and I let her sleep for an hour? I find that pointless because I always have to wake her up again at 11am, you know? Pfft, it's difficult sometimes. She's allowed to stay awake longer, I'd love to, but I follow Rie Blom's routine: wake up, refresh, eat, play, sleep, so I find it a bit difficult. I also don't want to put more than 4 hours between her feeds during the day, and if I leave 3 hours between them, she'd have to eat vegetable porridge at 10am or at 1pm (which is also possible) (maybe try again, but then I'm back to more bottles).
Anyway, I'm just struggling with the fact that she's so tired during the day and takes such long naps, and that she wakes up so much at night, which she didn't do before. Maybe this will all resolve after her growth spurt, and maybe I just need to learn to read her better.
ElkeDekock started this 2 months ago #6

I did some calculations. If I keep her on 5 bottles and follow the old schedule, she gets to 18 hours of sleep during the day with naps of 2.5 hours (maybe too long). If I put her back on 6 bottles, she also gets to 18 hours of sleep in a day, but with a 1.5-hour nap... maybe that's better?
Falca 2 months ago #7

One tip I can give for nighttime is to set a time limit with yourself that you find acceptable to wait before checking on her. For example, 5 or 10 minutes. When you hear her, look at the clock and wait that amount of time. Sometimes it feels like a long time, but actually not much time has passed. You mentioned that when you go in, she’s lying there with her eyes closed. Could it be that she’s just dreaming and maybe not really awake when she cries?

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