1st trimester
Just pregnant
My boyfriend and I didn’t really plan it, but we had chosen to stop my pill. We didn’t expect it to happen so soon. (Stopped for 1 month, next month I was pregnant).
My boyfriend doesn’t really want to talk about it yet, and he also wants to keep it private until 12 weeks. It seems like he only wants to talk about it from 12 weeks onwards because anything could still go wrong.
I understand him, but I’m a woman and I want to talk about it, of course, because yes, it’s our baby.
Can someone give me some advice on this?
Thanks in advance, ladies.
Replies
-
Anonymous Guest #2
It's true that you both feel good together. You can choose to tell only the parents. It's just what you want and what feels right for you.
The chance of something going wrong is always there. I myself had a miscarriage at five weeks. And we were glad we hadn't told anyone. But you can also experience a lot of support when you do tell people.
Many choose to tell after 12/13 weeks. The chance of something going wrong is still there, of course, but smaller.
Enjoy it together, and definitely talk about it with each other. -
Anonymous Guest #3
I'm reading now that your friend probably only wants to talk about it with you in 12 weeks. Maybe he finds it super exciting etc. It seems wise to me to talk to him about it carefully or let him read things. So that he understands what's happening in and with your body. And can prepare himself too. -
liesje #4
Anonymous messages!
Thanks for your messages!
1st anonymous message: I'd really like to tell my parents myself, but he really wants to wait until 12 weeks unfortunately. I guess I'll just have to be patient about that. It's true that things can still go wrong, but after 12 weeks there's less chance. It's too bad you had a miscarriage at 5 weeks. Hopefully everything goes well next time. Thanks for your message.
2nd anonymous message: Yes, he finds it exciting too and he's quite a down-to-earth person haha. Every now and then I try it and then he does join in a bit. But it doesn't have to be every day. And every night before going to sleep, he puts his hand on my belly for a bit. That's how he shows it, I think.
Thanks for your message too! -
Raisa #5
Exciting, isn't it, that first trimester? I'm 5 weeks pregnant myself and way more excited than my husband
.
He does talk about it with me, but the tension I feel... whether everything is okay and if things will go smoothly... he doesn't quite get that. He just says... wait calmly, but I can't do that.
But he does join in when I'm looking around for baby stuff. I'm not buying much, of course, unless I spot a real bargain online. -
Anonymous Guest #6
Raisa, are you already buying things? I wouldn't really do that if I were you. At 5 weeks, the chance of a miscarriage is higher than 9%. That's a lot, and if it goes wrong, the confrontation only gets bigger. Anyway, good luck. -
Anonymous Guest #7
Oops, it's even 27.3% that it goes wrong. -
liesje #8
Yeah, exactly! Same here. But I think we women experience and go through it differently anyway. The only thing he can do is wait; it’ll come with time. -
liesje #9
From what I've read, it seems like the percentage is higher than I thought. It feels like almost every woman has experienced it at least once. It really scares me.
-
Raisa #10
Anonymous, I'm going with the positive! If I focus on all the things that could go wrong, I'd become a walking drama queen.
Besides, I'm not buying a nursery or any of that stuff. I already have nephews and nieces, so I'll just use things I can also use for them. I already have baby stuff ready for when they're here.
And after a miscarriage, another baby can follow, right? So I'm staying positive. Your percentages still show over 70% successful pregnancies, and that's what I'm going with
Add your reply
Share what helped you, or ask a question.
Sign in to join the conversation.
Continue with GoogleTakes a moment. You’ll come straight back here to reply.