Forum Losing weight

Obesity and getting pregnant

10 replies

Poppemie
Hi everyone
My partner and I have been trying to get pregnant for over a year now, but without any success
So, I went to see a gynecologist in March so we could get tested to see if everything is okay. After a five-minute round of questions, he bluntly said that I would have a very hard time getting pregnant because I am overweight and my partner smokes. I was really hurt by this. I know I am overweight and I am working on it. I am about 25 kilos overweight and have already lost 5 kilos, so still 20 to go. Now I am seriously considering getting a second opinion from another gynecologist, but I am afraid that this one will also immediately kick me out because I am too heavy. I just fear that once I lose my excess weight and he starts testing us, negative results will show up and all this time will have been wasted. (The only benefit would be that I no longer have excess weight )
So my question is basically (to make a long story short) can/do gynecologists treat us like this? Or should they test us even if I am overweight? Are there maybe other people who are dealing with this?
Thanks for the feedback

Replies

  1. Tooby #2

    It’s simply a fact that being overweight reduces the chances of getting pregnant. A doctor may refuse to test if they see a reason that the problem lies elsewhere.

    Losing weight itself has a direct positive effect, so not just once you’re no longer overweight, but simply by losing weight.

    I’d suggest he quits smoking and you keep losing weight, plus do ovulation tests to increase your chances. If that doesn’t work after a while, you can go back to the doctor or maybe try a different one.

  2. Tooby #3

    It’s definitely better to have a healthy weight before getting pregnant, so even though it’s tough news, try to see it as an investment. The sooner you reach your goal (in a healthy way), the better your chances of conceiving, and the lower the risk of complications during pregnancy and birth.

  3. Poppemie started this #4

    Hi Tooby, thanks for your reply.
    I'm definitely planning to keep losing weight (not always easy, but still).
    I've done ovulation tests once before and the result wasn't pregnancy either, maybe I should do it again.
    Asking my partner to stop smoking... I think he'd find that a silly question since we know people who have kids and still smoke, so yeah....
    How's it going for you? Are you pregnant or do you already have some kids?

  4. Tooby #5

    Just because people who smoke have kids doesn't mean it makes it harder or brings more risks for a child. People who are overweight can also have children.

    We've been trying to conceive our first baby for a little while now, and both my husband and I need to lose some weight—not a huge amount, but still. It's not always easy, but I force myself to do it because being overweight reduces the chances of getting pregnant, increases the risk of complications during pregnancy and birth, and raises the likelihood that the child will have a predisposition to being overweight and other health issues.

    The same goes for smoking. If your partner doesn't want to quit, at least make them smoke away from you, because it's really harmful, even though there are healthy babies born to parents who smoke.

  5. Tooby #6

    The first sentence should be: doesn't mean it makes it any harder*

  6. Poppemie started this #7

    Honestly? I'd also much rather have him quit smoking. But he has to be on board with that himself; I can't push him into it.
    Oh, that's not nice to hear, you shouldn't have to lose a lot of weight for all the luck. Does your husband also need to lose weight? I've never heard that before. Could this also have negative effects otherwise? (I mean when trying to conceive)
    Hope you'll be able to call yourself a mom soon

  7. Tooby #8

    Yeah, it doesn’t work in men’s favor either. There are a lot of things that can worsen and reduce the quality and number of sperm cells, for example, ejaculating too many times in a row or too often in a week, tight underwear due to temperature, and being overweight.
    Good luck!

  8. Trees87 #9

    We took a moment to reflect on our habits after a year... and it might sound ridiculous now, but my husband drank a lot of soy drinks. He eventually had to give them up for me. Sometimes you have to let go of something for the greater good, just like you 'should' lose weight. Everyone has their part to play. I think after a year, you can definitely ask to get tested, aside from your weight. For all we know, it could be your hormones or your husband's sperm. I'd throw everything into the fight!!!!! Good luck!

  9. Joanie000 #10

    I've always had a lot of excess weight and have been lucky enough to carry 4 kids, 1*.
    Now I'm overweight again (a lot!) and might be pregnant again.
    It could be nonsense, right? Stand your ground and go for it.

  10. Anonymous #11

    @@sGWrc

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