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Stress
Cnudje_1Guest ·
Hi
I gave birth to a little girl last Monday.
We've been home since Thursday and I'm crying every day. Breastfeeding is going super well but it's very intense. Since I was discharged, I barely sleep at night because our little one always wants to be at the breast (feeding, but also sucking and being with mom (cluster feeding)). Sometimes I can sleep a bit during the day when she sleeps, but that's not much either. The midwife comes, then Kind en Gezin, then a check-up with the pediatrician...more visits...it just doesn't seem to end.
I feel like I'm at my wit's end and my relationship with my husband is on the verge of breaking. He says he'll take over all the household chores, but whenever I ask for something, I just hear that I'm short or not friendly...yeah, he can sleep well, can't he!
I'm also tired of the accusations. While I'm, for example, nursing, I type this quickly with one hand and he says 'you're not paying attention to your child'...I could explode!
We also always end up arguing when changing diapers or giving a bottle. One of us watches the other's actions and comments on them. All these things are still awkward because it's our first child, but this can't go on.
All this arguing isn't good for my daughter! She cries, then calls out to defend me...but I'm exhausted.
Did you guys experience this too?
I gave birth to a little girl last Monday.
We've been home since Thursday and I'm crying every day. Breastfeeding is going super well but it's very intense. Since I was discharged, I barely sleep at night because our little one always wants to be at the breast (feeding, but also sucking and being with mom (cluster feeding)). Sometimes I can sleep a bit during the day when she sleeps, but that's not much either. The midwife comes, then Kind en Gezin, then a check-up with the pediatrician...more visits...it just doesn't seem to end.
I feel like I'm at my wit's end and my relationship with my husband is on the verge of breaking. He says he'll take over all the household chores, but whenever I ask for something, I just hear that I'm short or not friendly...yeah, he can sleep well, can't he!
I'm also tired of the accusations. While I'm, for example, nursing, I type this quickly with one hand and he says 'you're not paying attention to your child'...I could explode!
We also always end up arguing when changing diapers or giving a bottle. One of us watches the other's actions and comments on them. All these things are still awkward because it's our first child, but this can't go on.
All this arguing isn't good for my daughter! She cries, then calls out to defend me...but I'm exhausted.
Did you guys experience this too?
Replies
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JojoB #2
Sorry to hear you're experiencing such a tough week after birth. It's totally understandable that you're tired and have a short fuse. What you really don't need right now is a man who thinks he knows best. You can definitely tell him that, but maybe at a moment when there's no tension. Let him know you're feeling completely drained... dealing with hormonal ups and downs, and that he should just bear with it for now.
As for visitors... you can decline them. Or, if you do go up, leave after just a little while. No one benefits from you being completely frustrated at home later on, and your baby certainly doesn't. Take care of yourself first, and the rest will fall into place.
Don't hesitate to ask for help from your parents, family, or friends, and talk about your emotions with, for example, your midwife or doctor. Don't let yourself get bogged down for too long, okay? Parenting is pretty intense!
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