Time-out corner isn't a nice way to teach your baby something.

I'd rather do it with my toddler than not, because she has kids of her own too, so she's just there to help when they have a tantrum, hold them, and say, "Mommy still loves you, calm down, why are you so angry, sweetheart?"
So instead of punishing them in a corner, you help your child out of their tantrum.
And instead of saying "you're annoying," you say "you're doing something annoying," so the child knows that you love them but just find their behavior annoying.
Now I was wondering, are there more mothers who prefer not to use this approach?
Greetings, Madelene

Hi Faile,
Yeah, that's true for both. Maybe it's a bit extreme to say, but I think the method is good for people who hit their kids. It's better for them to do it this way instead of hitting, and I think that's good for such people.

For parents who, for example, tend to hit quickly and struggle to control themselves, and don't know how to communicate with their young children, so they resort to hitting—such parents might find the "time out" or "naughty step" method helpful.
But personally, I don't like it; I find it a distant way of interacting with your child.

Hi Faile, I hadn't finished my message yet haha, I thought I'd make some tea. Thanks for your quick reply.

I don't think it's necessary to prepare my kids for the fact that life can be hard later on. I spoil my little ones while I can, now that they're small. Soon enough they'll have plenty of worries and responsibilities, so that's why I want them to enjoy being kids now. So that later they can look back on a loving, warm childhood where they weren't punished but had space to talk.

My eldest daughter, who's 5, is also allowed to just give her opinion. For example, if she says, "Mum, you don't look good like that," I don't say, "How rude, you're not allowed to say that." Instead, I say, "Thank you, Yara, for your honest answer. It's very good that you're honest with Mum."

I think it's important for children to learn to form their own opinions and to be themselves, to a certain extent, of course. But I see that a lot of parents don't appreciate this and actually unconsciously hold back a child's pure honesty.

Anyway, I'm drifting off, let me just stop there.

Sorry for all the messages, my phone's been acting up. I always talk to my girls and never use spanking; I explain everything why I don't want something. I never say "you're annoying" because, even if it sounds crazy or far-fetched, a child (especially a toddler) absorbs everything, and unconsciously they literally start to feel like an annoying person and think their parent finds them annoying as a person. So I always say "you're being annoying right now." Then I make it clear that I don't want that behavior from her at that moment, but I do love her as a person; I only disapprove of her behavior at that moment. So I only find her annoying for that moment. Anyway, we never used spanking at home either. I guess I picked that up from my family. I respect how others parent; everyone does it their own way. But personally, I prefer doing it this way. It's nice to share with other ladies and mothers. Greetings, Madelene

Hi Muus, that's exactly what I mean by approaching things positively and definitely not letting them cry. I know what you mean, that's more my parenting style. Greetings, Madelene

Hi Manon, what you describe, I can relate to with some kids. Sometimes it's better to just leave them alone and ignore them.

I do that sometimes with my oldest when she has a tantrum because she's tired, for example. Then I just leave her for a bit. She says, "Mama, you're not nice, I'm so mad at you," and she's in a bad mood.

Then I usually say, "Yes, but Mama thinks you're so sweet." Then she goes to her room, closes the door, angry, and I just let her calm down on her own. She always comes back on her own.

But I also know that I get those comments directed at me because she's tired and I don't understand her quickly enough.