Ladies, I was wondering what you think about a 1 year and 9 months difference between the kids? Nice gap or would you prefer a bit more?

It's different for everyone. It might also depend on the situation and finances. Personally, I'd wait until my son is a bit older and more independent, and understands a bit more. I also really want to enjoy just him for a while. Maybe it also depends on what your eldest is like. Our son is a little climber and can do some dangerous things. He's 18 months now, and I want to be able to keep a good eye on him. I don't think I could combine that with a little one yet. What does your gut and your husband say?

I have a daughter myself, she's 4 now and is super active and asks for so much attention. I consciously decided not to have a second because I saw how active my daughter is and how much attention she needs from me. She really clings to me; she was quite the handful. Now she's a bit calmer compared to before, but still very active and asks for a lot of attention. I was so happy when I saw my bed again and she was in it, and I could finally rest. So I'm really glad that my husband and I don't have a second one yet. We'd like to have one someday, but only when she's around 8 years old, definitely not earlier. I also agree with Anonymous that you really need to enjoy your first child because it's such a shame to immediately get busy with a second one. Good luck with your choice. Greetings, Mirije.

hi elena this is of course different for everyone but i have 2 daughters who are a bit more than 2 years apart and i can tell you it's so heavy i underestimated it didn't think about it well enough it's tough years really i love my girls with all my heart but it's terribly hard first of all they're always fighting because because they're so close in age their interests are so close together which means if one has something the other wants it too so fighting and i sometimes see mothers in my area with one child how jealous i am of the time they can take calmly not constantly but having to divide their attention you know with 2 kids you're never really done i never feel like now i'm done time for myself because when one daughter sleeps the other comes and if one stops crying the other starts you can comfort that one you're at the end of your day broken and dividing attention is as exhausting as my oldest daughter ilona goes to my grandmother and i'm alone with my youngest marieke then it's such a relief so nice just being alone time together without always that fighting and my voice raising when they fight again or that heartbreaking sound of them fighting over who i listen to first i really notice then that i never really listen to either of them i feel like i'm running through the day and quickly hoping it's evening sorry for the long explanation but if i can give you advice i say from real experience wait a bit longer enjoy your daughter first and consciously experience all her milestones because i have no time for that with two greetings deborah

It sounds really nice if they don't have too much of an age difference
When our son turns 1, we'd also like to try for a second baby.

Good luck with your choice!

Sounds like a cozy little sibling pair!

We also want a second one, but we think a gap of 2.5 to 3 years is nice. Then our little rascal will understand that mom needs to feed or change the baby for a bit. And he’ll probably be better able to entertain himself during those moments.

But it sounds like you’re still unsure if this is the right time for you. If you have doubts, I’d definitely wait a bit longer. Even just to think it over.

I can also totally understand why some people choose to keep the age gap small.

Go with your gut feeling.

Oh and congratulations!