Fear of childbirth

I would definitely reach out to someone who can help with your anxiety, like a psychologist or therapist, or at least your midwife. Doesn't she have any tips? Maybe the midwife on this site has some for you (you can find them under 'questions' in the menu).

Hi Karina,

I hope you get responses that are helpful to you. I had a C-section with my daughter and know that I'll also be giving birth via C-section this time (can't be any other way due to previous surgeries).

I hope you can make an appointment with someone who can help you with your anxiety through your GP. Also discuss the pain relief options during labor with your midwife; perhaps the information you receive will reassure you a lot.

Hi Karina,
giving birth isn't fun either, so it's not surprising that you're worried about it. Just remember that you still have some time to prepare! Take a pregnancy course, write a birth plan, and discuss it with your OB-GYN. Talk to your partner about how you want to approach the birth, and also how you see the postpartum period regarding groceries, who will care for your other child, and visitors. Once you've got all the practical stuff sorted, you can fully focus on your birth and postpartum period!

I was just talking about this with friends recently: newborn babies and new moms don't look as radiant in real life as they do in those Pampers or other baby product ads. Your body needs to recover, everyone needs to adjust, and that pink cloud isn't as automatic as it seems, especially with all the possible postpartum challenges lurking around.

With my first, I wasn't afraid of anything; I didn't think much about it either, kind of like, "it'll all work out somehow." With the second, I was mostly anxious about the birth early in the pregnancy, but not by the end. Now I notice I'm dreading the birth again.

Trust your body! And if it doesn't turn into a pink-cloud birth/postpartum period, that'll pass too... the moment to enjoy will come eventually!

I get what Froop means, but I do see some nice aspects to giving birth too.
I’m actually looking forward to it a bit (I’m probably not right in the head either, haha) because it’s all so new and exciting, it doesn’t have to be scary.
Try to trust yourself!!

Try to focus as much attention as possible on your baby, wonder what he/she looks like, who would he or she resemble most? Try to build a bond with your little one now.

I’ve been constantly talking to my belly these last few days and almost comforting her with: "Everything will be fine soon, don’t worry.. We can do this!!" Haha, nonsense of course, my way of cheering myself up,
but it works, it calms me down..

And I’ve heard lately about births that went very calmly and serenely, if music helps you, or candlelight or a certain scent calms you down,
then definitely use that!!
And the person who is with you during the birth can be a big support. Definitely don’t bring anyone who might make you nervous.
You can also always look for a Doula??

A friend of mine just gave birth and to my great surprise she told me that by the time she arrived at the hospital she was already 9 cm dilated!!! And that the pain was even manageable!! (Even though she was terrified, she managed to do it without an epidural)
2 hours later she gave birth!!!
So it can be like that too!

Love, Olivia

That's exactly what I mean! You're already at the point where you can give birth, you've had all those months to get used to the idea!
Good luck!

Hi Karina,

Lots of positive things have already been shared.
This is my 2nd birth, and I have to say that as it gets closer, I'm finding it all quite nerve-wracking again.
My previous birth was 16 years ago; I definitely didn't look as radiant as in the ads afterward, but I was incredibly proud of myself and our daughter, and that really shows in the photos!

I could get really worked up about it now, but I don't feel like it, strange as it may sound. I want to experience this consciously. I know it's different from a nice day out, but it's an incredibly beautiful event that just happens to hurt.

I'm trying to let it wash over me. I've already talked things through with my partner about how it might go (he only experienced a C-section with his son, so for him it's the first time too, hopefully it'll work out at least), and I have full confidence in him and the hospital staff.

Kind regards, Dani