Baby Names
Why such unique names
Selby
I have a question and I sincerely hope it doesn't offend anyone. But maybe it's something to think about for a moment.
I keep seeing such unusual names come up here as options for the baby. Names that you don't just remember. Names where you have to see them a few times to know how to spell them. And then I wonder, why? Why are you looking for a more unique name for your child? Is your child better/more special than another child? Again, I really don't mean it in a snide way. But my child has a very typical Dutch name, one of those 12-in-a-dozen ones. People hear it once and they know it. And yes, there are 2 other kids at the daycare with that name. It's not for nothing that it's been in the top 10 for years. And yet, my child is also unique and special.
Aren't you afraid that with a difficult, unusual name, your child won't be able to pronounce their own name for years to come? And that other people will say "huh..? pardon..? how do you spell that?" three times during introductions, and that will be the rest of that child's life. Before you know it, they'll get a nickname, at work or something later on. (I'm just talking about a "he" here, otherwise I'd keep going with "he/she"-ing)
I myself have a fairly ordinary name, but spelled differently than usual, and that's already exhausting! People always spell it wrong, or I have to start spelling it out immediately. With my last name, I also get the standard question "is that with a D or a T"? but well, you have less influence on that. (I mean your last name)
I just wondered. I heard on TV a while ago about a child named "Dechantelie" or something like that. Can that girl still not pronounce it for years? You can already see one child asking another "what's your name?" -"Dechantelie", with a little stumble, and the other child "huh...?"
But yeah, I was just thinking out loud. If I offended or hurt someone, that wasn't my intention.
I keep seeing such unusual names come up here as options for the baby. Names that you don't just remember. Names where you have to see them a few times to know how to spell them. And then I wonder, why? Why are you looking for a more unique name for your child? Is your child better/more special than another child? Again, I really don't mean it in a snide way. But my child has a very typical Dutch name, one of those 12-in-a-dozen ones. People hear it once and they know it. And yes, there are 2 other kids at the daycare with that name. It's not for nothing that it's been in the top 10 for years. And yet, my child is also unique and special.
Aren't you afraid that with a difficult, unusual name, your child won't be able to pronounce their own name for years to come? And that other people will say "huh..? pardon..? how do you spell that?" three times during introductions, and that will be the rest of that child's life. Before you know it, they'll get a nickname, at work or something later on. (I'm just talking about a "he" here, otherwise I'd keep going with "he/she"-ing)
I myself have a fairly ordinary name, but spelled differently than usual, and that's already exhausting! People always spell it wrong, or I have to start spelling it out immediately. With my last name, I also get the standard question "is that with a D or a T"? but well, you have less influence on that. (I mean your last name)
I just wondered. I heard on TV a while ago about a child named "Dechantelie" or something like that. Can that girl still not pronounce it for years? You can already see one child asking another "what's your name?" -"Dechantelie", with a little stumble, and the other child "huh...?"
But yeah, I was just thinking out loud. If I offended or hurt someone, that wasn't my intention.
Replies
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Chanti #2
I think you shouldn't worry too much about it, haha.
What feels like a unique name to you might not seem so special to someone else. I don't think parents think: 'I'm giving my child a really unique name because he/she is better than a Kees-Jan.'
'Unique' means something different to everyone ;-) -
Selby started this #3
Thanks for your reply
No okay, but that's exactly why I'm asking. Now I understand it a bit better -
sweet #4
I have an Iranian husband, and we also gave our daughter a name that you never really hear, but it's actually quite simple, easy to pronounce, and easy to spell. I love it.
But names that you pronounce one way and spell completely differently, I don't quite understand either, haha.
I'm not a fan of those typical Dutch names that are very common. Luckily, everyone has their own taste
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Orchidea #5
I agree with Chanti, and parents don't just pick a name for their child out of nowhere; they've really thought it through. I actually find some names quite special, and I also went for a not-so-common name, although I hear it more and more often now. ;-) But that wasn't with the idea of "god, my child is better," because I don't want to give my child that either. -
Mimi #6
We did take the names off the top 3 list, but mainly because one or two with the same name might be okay, but more than that is really less fun. I had 2 other Mimis in my class myself and it didn't bother me at all
Furthermore, more unique names are preferred. Especially because they're new to us, I think. Not because our child is more unique than other children (to us, of course, but realistically not, haha). We do think about the spelling, though; it should be intuitive. For example, I'd never go with Levy or something like that. -
♡ Ilona ♡ #7
What you can worry about, I say
Everyone is different and unique in their own way. What does it matter? That choice is different for everyone, isn't it?! -
Floor Guest #8
Let me refer to the old saying: “everyone’s got their own taste.”
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Selby started this #9
Okay, I'll say it 3 more times that I was just curious. Apparently it still rubs some people the wrong way. Sorry. -
Lou Guest #10
Hi Selby! I think you’re totally allowed to ask this question (it’s like saying there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers), although I personally don’t worry about it at all.
I do think tastes just differ. What you find unusual also depends on your frame of reference. If the kids in your family are named Jaap, Tom, Femke, and Floor, then adding a name like Joep feels very 'normal'. However, Joep stands out more when it’s in a family/environment with names like Lino, Desyah, and Jin.
Also, some people might want to give their child a name outside the top X, because they want to avoid their child having classmates with the same name, etc.
And if you work in education/care/daycare, you already have a lot of associations with certain names, which you might want to avoid by choosing a unique name. -
Mrs. D #11
You should check out the Facebook group 'Proud to be a supermommy'.. Seriously, there are names in there that are just unpronounceable.. and it's not because of foreign origins.. but because of creative letter puzzles... I know what you mean and I'm happy for the parents who manage to come up with a name, but for me it can be special too, but you can also go over the top... -
sweet #12
Haha, Mrs. D, I’m on that too. I sometimes see some weird stuff there. With our daughter, it’s really not that bad though.
Her name is Nava Elena. We chose it because of the meanings.
You hear Nova super often. Nava, not so much, and it’s Iranian and we really wanted an Iranian name. -
Joy #13
I also think it’s weird, Selby
I can perfectly understand names with a certain origin or from other languages. But some people mess around with names or think they’re being original by giving names that aren’t even names... People then say 'oh how unique...' and you immediately know they think it sounds ugly
As for me, I don’t have a top 10 name. Just always a regular name that’s easy to spell and pronounce. We did that on purpose. Not popular, but still normal. At my daughter’s school, I sometimes have to ask 3 times... What’s her/his name? And if they still have half-long hair, I even have to guess the gender too.
But I can also find names that are completely different from our taste normal. We’re not into English names. This doesn’t mean I think English names are weird or special. Until the parents start messing around, of course... -
Anonymous Guest #14
Haha yes, always personal choices when it comes to names... I consciously chose Dutch names with a little twist... I find those names more beautiful and I always remember them better... When someone says "Annelinde", I immediately know which girl they mean... If someone starts talking about "Wouter", I first have to ask which one, and the last names aren't always remembered well either. So it's exactly the kids with less common names that I remember from my school days.
And yes, I do hate it when the teacher calls out "Julia" and three girls come forward. -
Anonymous Guest #15
I wouldn't go for a top 10 name myself, partly because I already carry the number 1 name from my birth year. I always had multiple people with the same name in my class.
But I also wouldn't choose one of those cobbled-together names where you have to ask multiple times to get the name right. Or where parents change the spelling to make it unique, but as a result, you probably always have to spell your name. -
Selby started this #16
Interesting comments. Thanks! Wow, indeed, if you call out Wouter, you might still get a "which one?" look. On the whole, it wasn't too bad since we really liked Sem or Sam, but they were definitely in the top 3 haha. Oh well. We liked a short Dutch name, also because we both have flat, simple last names. I've always found American names nice, like Shane. But together with a plain Dutch last name? Oh well, in the end, everyone should be happy with their own chosen name -
Gast Guest #17
We chose the names because we love that style. It’s a shame they’re not exactly well-known in the Netherlands. And yes, sometimes it takes a bit of effort to spell them correctly, but that’s just how it is.
Anyway, we definitely didn’t choose them with the thought that 'my child is superior to all others'! -
Anonymous Guest #18
Why stress about it?
Everyone has their own taste, right? So just pick a name that feels right for you. -
Puck #19
Everyone can be happy with their own choice, but I do feel for TS. I don't think anyone thinks their child is better and therefore deserves a special name. But people like something special and often go overboard. Then it's names that are made up, which means you often have to repeat them. Or, in my opinion, even more inconvenient, a well-known name but spelled differently. Then you still have to keep explaining it all the time.
We didn't choose a very unique name, but one that wasn't very common. It was ranked 145th among all girls' names. Then she ended up with two other girls with the same name at daycare. Well, there's not much you can do about that.
For us, a name doesn't need to be unique, as long as we find it beautiful. And I don't find such an artificial name beautiful. But if you like it: go for it! -
Selby started this #20
Why stress about it?
Everyone has their own taste, right? So everyone can just pick a name that feels right for them.
I'm not stressed at all, I made that clear—I was just curious. And some answers helped me understand better. Also, with a common name (which my son has), you run into the issue of having multiple kids with that name in class, so people end up asking "which one?" But yeah, it's usually the "anonymous lurkers" who skim-read and then feel free to say whatever they want anonymously
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