Forum Baby wish

Experience with vacation far away

30 replies · page 1 of 2

IrisssGuest ·
Hi ladies,

I’m curious to hear your opinions and any experiences you might have with this.

We’ve been trying to conceive for a while now, and the desire has grown incredibly strong over the past few months. On top of that, I have 8 girls around me who are either pregnant or have just given birth. It’s not that being around other pregnant women directly strengthens your desire, but you do start thinking about it more, especially when you’re witnessing it so closely. Sometimes it feels a bit ‘jealous-inducing’, but in a positive way...

Anyway, I stopped taking the pill earlier this year (I think in February) and I feel super good about it! I never had issues with hormones while on the pill, but I notice I feel better in my skin now, or maybe it’s in my head... and I have much less trouble with my period now that I’ve stopped the pill, which I find a bit weird because initially, I went on the pill precisely to deal with severe symptoms... familiar? Now I barely bleed at all and have no issues whatsoever, weird haha.

So far, I’ve had nice regular cycles of 26/28 days, which I’m very happy about... but here’s the catch: I’m going on vacation to Thailand in August, and I recently went to the GGD (public health service) to get a booster vaccination and ask for advice regarding our desire to conceive. Unfortunately, the Zika virus is present in Asia. Although the risk in Thailand is supposedly negligible, they still advise me to be careful and avoid getting pregnant. Mmm, bit of a downer, but ultimately I’m glad I’m not pregnant yet, so we’ll have safe sex until then to prevent pregnancy by using condoms and not the pill, since I feel so good without it...

This is a bit of a downer for me. I’m really looking forward to our vacation together, and I don’t want to take any risks until then, but I’m really irritated and frustrated because once you’re ready to go for it, you want to do it!

The thing is, I’ve traveled far away before, and the people at the GGD tend to exaggerate things quite a bit for us Dutch people. They advise women to wait at least a month after returning home before trying to conceive, and men two months... and honestly, I don’t agree with this... there are blood tests, and we can get those done after some persistence...

I’m thinking, I don’t want to take any risks, and I’ll just let things play out there on the spot and see how things are, then decide what to do afterward, even after the vacation. Maybe I’ll wait another 3 months after the vacation for extra peace of mind, or I’ll get the blood tests done to see if we’ve had the virus...

But this dilemma is drama. I know so many pregnant women who travel all over the world with no issues, and globally, 9 out of 10 children are born normal... I need to be patient like many of you, but I find this really difficult.. pffff

Does anyone have experience with this or can give me advice?

The GGD is very protective and strict, but the rest of the world in other continents is also pretty normal, except for a few cases...

Ideally, I’d get pregnant tomorrow, but I find this so hard..

What do you think?

Hope to hear from you soon.

Lots of love,
Iris who wants to go on vacation but also doesn’t haha

Replies

Page 1 of 2

  1. Happy girl Guest #2

    I didn’t even know there was Zika in Thailand?
    Honestly, I’d never even think to ask about it, but now that you know, it’s natural to be worried...
    I’ve never even gotten vaccinations for Thailand either...
    I don’t know what I’d do in your place. Based on how I’m feeling right now, I personally couldn’t bring myself to put aside my desire for a child just for a vacation, but everyone’s different...
    I hope you figure it out...

  2. Tooby #3

    You're going in August already..that's 7-11 weeks away. It's not like you have to put it off for a year now, right? If you really want to go to Thailand and can, do it now, because once you have kids, it takes a long time before you can go again (unless you bring your kid with you).

  3. Anonymous Guest #4

    No vaccinations for Thailand?
    They use categories, and Thailand is just barely in category 3 (zero risk). The place we're going has no malaria and very likely no Zika either.
    But what Toby writes is totally right... you end up dealing with this the whole time and end up doubting, ugh.

  4. Anonymous Guest #5

    Thailand is in category 2. I just checked again because we're going to America while I'm pregnant, and that's in category 3. Honestly, I haven't heard much about the Zika virus lately. You should do what feels right for you. We're going anyway, since very few people were affected at the peak (2016) of Zika in America. I think the chance of catching something dangerous in the Netherlands (like catching kids' fifth disease from kids) is just as big as getting bitten by a Zika mosquito. Now Thailand is category 2, so slightly "worse," but I think it's not a big deal... but that's just my opinion. You decide in the end!

  5. Anonymous Guest #6

    Yeah, category 2, yes... just barely.
    Yeah, I see so many pregnant ladies everywhere and nowhere on vacation, nothing wrong. Well, I think it's just like that there, I don't think I'll wait for four months when I get back, haha.. which woman can do that.
    If you come home healthy and don't get sick, you haven't caught anything, let's hope so... and cross our fingers that we'll have luck soon.
    But oh my, it's so hard not to think about it here...

  6. Tooby #7

    ''If you come home healthy and don't get sick, you haven't caught anything, let's hope so... ''
    1 in 5 people gets symptoms, which means that 4 in 5 people have no symptoms, but still has the zika virus.
    Well, if you do get the virus, can you forgive yourself for not waiting a few months longer? Anyway, the advice is to wait 1 or 2 months after, not 4 months, so it's not that bad.
    Compare it a bit to, for example, drinking alcohol or smoking before pregnancy or eating raw meat during pregnancy..would you do that?

    Of course it sucks to have to wait, but I personally wouldn't want to take the risk. I'd choose: Thailand or getting pregnant. Not both.
    Then I'd choose Thailand, because if you're pregnant it's a no-go, if you've just given birth it's a no-go and unless you want to leave your young child alone with your parents (etc.) for a while so you can go on vacation, you can't go on vacation to such a country in the first few years.

  7. Tooby #8

    Just a little extra tip: you're also advised to avoid raw meat (i.e., don't eat it) when trying to conceive, along with other dietary guidelines, since the illness you could catch from these products might not show up until weeks or 2-3 months later. So you're still at risk.

  8. Merel #9

    Actually, it's pretty simple; there's ONE risk. It's up to you to decide how much risk you want to take!

  9. Anonymous Guest #10

    Thanks tooby, you're absolutely right.
    When I get home, we'll get tested. And I shouldn't make such a big deal out of it, but it's pretty tough..
    And the vacation we're going on is also really nice, I didn't know about the raw meat thing, but good to know.
    And smoking is a definite no-go for me. So I understand what you mean????

  10. Tooby #11

    Yeah, it's definitely tough, I can totally imagine that! Smoking is bad anyway, and eating raw meat only gets you sick sometimes, well you don't want to take that risk (just like with Zika).
    I think you're making a sensible choice haha, but it's totally up to you, I mean.. there are healthy babies born to moms who smoked during pregnancy, but still, better safe than sorry!

  11. Anonymous Guest #12

    Yeah, that's true, but I really think smoking during pregnancy is so stupid... and risking the Zika virus too...
    You know, everything always goes well. But we'll be the ones who aren't... and then I could have prevented it. And don't blame yourself.
    Thanks for responding anyway, it's always nice to get confirmation that I just need to be patient and that our time will come. Plenty of time... (for us, at least)

  12. Merel #13

    Exactly!

  13. Sophie Guest #14

    We're going on our honeymoon to Bali in September. Zika was also confirmed there years ago. However, these bugs are more common in the jungle and not in the resorts. So we're just going to take the chance. I am well-prepared though, I have mosquito spray with 50% DEET. We'll see, the chance is still quite high that we won't be pregnant in the first few months anyway.

  14. Anoniem Guest #15

    @Tooby what you're saying about raw meat isn't entirely true. In fact, if you've already eaten it (in the years before you wanted to get pregnant), you're immune to that bacteria.

    Besides, in the first few months you don't have any blood connection with the baby at all. Of course, once you're pregnant (as soon as you have a positive test), you shouldn't want to take the risk, but it's really nonsense that you HAVE to stop immediately as soon as you want to get pregnant. Unfortunately, not everyone gets pregnant within a few months (more people don't than do) – it can also take years ;-) It's your own choice how you handle it, but be careful not to get too worked up about it ;-) it doesn't really work in your favor ;-)

  15. Tooby #16

    Well, I don't have to change that much myself, but they say pregnant women have a weaker immune system anyway, whether it's a blood tie or not, and it's not about being happy for months but rather about weeks. Of course, not everyone is pregnant, but if you assume that, then you wouldn't need to take folic acid 4 weeks before you start trying either.

    It's just advice, everyone should decide for themselves. There are plenty of women who just keep eating everything, even during pregnancy.
    I can't imagine someone stuffing themselves with raw meat haha, which is why I thought (maybe I'm wrong) that stopping raw meat wouldn't be such a big adjustment.
    Most people also stop drinking alcohol, so that shouldn't matter either (less is better haha).

  16. Anoniem Guest #17

    You literally wrote: "you shouldn't eat raw meat either when you're trying to conceive" ;-) So you're basically judging people who do eat it.

    I actually spoke to an OB-GYN because we're already in round 24 now, and she said that as long as you're not pregnant yet, you don't have to live like a pregnant woman—you can still enjoy a piece of meat (if you like it).

    There are plenty of women who only find out they're pregnant later on, and then, for example, eat some carpaccio during the holidays. But in the first weeks, this isn't harmful because there's no blood connection yet, so you can't transmit the bacteria anyway.

    I also have a vegetable garden myself, which is also something people say pregnant women should avoid—not because I'm pregnant, but I asked my OB-GYN about it, and she just said, "go ahead and keep gardening if it gives you peace of mind." And once you're pregnant, you can get tested for the bacteria. If it turns out you've already had it, you're immune and can keep gardening for the rest of the pregnancy (as long as you're physically up for it, of course).

    Of course, everyone should decide for themselves what they eat/drink before getting pregnant. And smoking and excessive alcohol consumption just wreck your own body, so you definitely shouldn't do that either ;-

    But @Tooby, try not to decide for others what they should or shouldn't do, and don't scare them with things that aren't scientifically backed up ;-)

  17. Tooby #18

    I’m not judging anyone at all. Saying that I think something is or isn’t right doesn’t mean I judge those who do things differently.

    I also clearly stated in my post that people should figure it out for THEMSELVES... so I don’t understand why you keep repeating that I should try not to decide for others what they should do.

    I literally said: " It’s really just advice, everyone should figure it out for themselves. "

    Again:

    It’s MY opinion.
    I’m already adjusting it.
    I’m NOT judging ANYONE who makes a different choice.
    So don’t say I’m trying to decide for others what they should do, when I never said that anywhere. People read too much between the lines. As an autistic person, I read what’s actually written, and when it says "everyone should figure it out for themselves," I mean... that everyone should figure it out THEMSELVES, literally. No hidden meanings, no sarcasm, no judgments... nothing.

    Hopefully that’s clear.

  18. Tooby #19

    And I do believe your OB-GYN (and others), I don’t mean to say she’s wrong, I’m just saying that personally I already take it into account based on the info about diseases, duration, and incubation period. I myself don’t want to take any risks.
    I’m not saying others do it that way, I’m just saying that’s how far I go and how I live as a pregnant woman.
    Hopefully you can just accept that too.

    Once again... seriously, everyone should do what they feel is right. I don’t judge anyone.

  19. Tooby #20

    I also think people should stop drinking alcohol. Am I judging them? No, not at all.
    That's what I meant. I don't want to push anything on people because people can really think for themselves. One person says one thing, another says something else, everyone has different experiences and opinions, and that's OK, thankfully! Otherwise, it'd be pretty boring, right? Haha

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