Health
Sentimental dad
Linamina
Hi lovely (expectant) moms,
I'm 12 weeks pregnant and over the moon. The pregnancy wasn't planned. I've only known the baby's father for about six months now; we never really had a relationship. We'd see each other once a week; have sex, watch a movie, etc. We did try to be a couple once, but he just kept dating other women behind my back.
When I found out I was pregnant, I told him immediately, of course. He didn't want anything to do with it, denied being the father (nonsense). It was sad to hear, and I really tried to change his mind, but unfortunately, it didn't work.
After not speaking for two months, he suddenly messaged me. He missed me, missed the sex, etc. I told him I only wanted to talk about the baby. Had he changed his mind? He still didn't know, said he wasn't planning anything, that he finds the world so scary, blah blah blah. I told him he's welcome to visit his child if he seeks help (he's bipolar) and supports us financially (whatever he can afford). He didn't really engage with that.
A few days later, he says he misses me again, wants photos of my body, wants me to come over (for sex). I keep clearly stating I don't want that. When I bring up the baby, he dodges the question, gets angry because he finds me too pushy, or ignores it. My patience is wearing thin, and I get the feeling he's playing games with me!
What should I do? He's had more than two months to think about it (but apparently, he hasn't). He's mentally unstable and admits he can't handle responsibility and expectations. I don't want to deprive my child of the chance to have a father! I grew up without a mother because my father kept her away from me, so I want to do everything I can to make sure my child has two parents. This is very sensitive for me. Can you guys help me out a bit?
Love,
I'm 12 weeks pregnant and over the moon. The pregnancy wasn't planned. I've only known the baby's father for about six months now; we never really had a relationship. We'd see each other once a week; have sex, watch a movie, etc. We did try to be a couple once, but he just kept dating other women behind my back.
When I found out I was pregnant, I told him immediately, of course. He didn't want anything to do with it, denied being the father (nonsense). It was sad to hear, and I really tried to change his mind, but unfortunately, it didn't work.
After not speaking for two months, he suddenly messaged me. He missed me, missed the sex, etc. I told him I only wanted to talk about the baby. Had he changed his mind? He still didn't know, said he wasn't planning anything, that he finds the world so scary, blah blah blah. I told him he's welcome to visit his child if he seeks help (he's bipolar) and supports us financially (whatever he can afford). He didn't really engage with that.
A few days later, he says he misses me again, wants photos of my body, wants me to come over (for sex). I keep clearly stating I don't want that. When I bring up the baby, he dodges the question, gets angry because he finds me too pushy, or ignores it. My patience is wearing thin, and I get the feeling he's playing games with me!
What should I do? He's had more than two months to think about it (but apparently, he hasn't). He's mentally unstable and admits he can't handle responsibility and expectations. I don't want to deprive my child of the chance to have a father! I grew up without a mother because my father kept her away from me, so I want to do everything I can to make sure my child has two parents. This is very sensitive for me. Can you guys help me out a bit?
Love,
Replies
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Anonymous Guest #2
Apparently not everything is perfect, huh? Otherwise, you wouldn't have accidentally gotten pregnant by someone you barely know. If you really wanted to avoid this at all costs, you should have taken better precautions. But well, there's nothing you can do about it now.
I'd give him some more time to get used to the idea. Two months is really not much for a man to adjust to this. If he continues like this until the end of the pregnancy, I'd draw my conclusions and keep him away from the baby. He/she will be better off in the long run without a father than with one who only brings disappointment. -
Linamina started this #3
As I already said, I'm overjoyed... We really don't need to talk anymore about how I could have prevented/avoided it. Seems irrelevant to me! But thank you for your reply.
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