Forum Biechthoekje

No girlfriends

14 replies

IlseGuest ·
I'm struggling with something... I'm pregnant and hoping someone can give me some advice. I'm a young woman who barely has any friends, and normally that wouldn't bother me, but in this case it's pretty awful because of the upcoming baby shower. What can I actually do? Someone wants a list of names and phone numbers to organize it! What should I do? I can only forward 3 people?
Hope someone can give me some advice.

Replies

  1. N.L. #2

    If I've learned one thing in life, it's to keep my circle small. How lovely is it to celebrate with just a small group and family. You also need dear people in life, the rest won't care about your pregnancy anyway (to put it bluntly).
    Don't stress, girl and congratulations on your pregnancy :-)

  2. Anoo Guest #3

    I’d just skip that. I’ve got the same thing going on. For that same reason, I didn’t do a bachelorette party when I got married.
    So you’re definitely not alone, okay!

  3. Anonymous Guest #4

    Maybe besides your close girlfriends, also invite people from your family like your mom, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, or your own sister if you have one. A baby shower in America isn't just for girlfriends but also for (female) family members. Plus, small can also be cozy and intimate.

  4. Anonymous Guest #5

    Thanks for your replies! I really appreciate reading them all. I’d be expecting 8 people in total, including family and parents, with 6 of them being family members.

  5. Anonymous Guest #6

    That's pretty weird to see then..

  6. elisa #7

    Maybe it's an idea to still invite the 8 people and then pretend you wanted to keep it small.. honestly, I wouldn't worry about it, girl!

  7. Anonymous Guest #8

    8 is great company; then you can at least talk to everyone.

  8. Amy #9

    My baby shower was also entirely made up of family.
    To be completely honest, I've completely drifted apart from my old friends and don't see or talk to them anymore. I have to say that I don't really mind.
    If you don't have a problem with it, then it's fine.
    Why would it look weird??

  9. Anonymous Guest #10

    I’d never organize a baby shower for myself because I don’t think you should force people to buy something for you. But well, I’m also not really into bringing that American fuss here.
    My friends organized it on their own for me, and that was really sweet. With a group of around 10 family and friends, it was quite cozy. So I’d say as long as there are people who care about you, it’s most fun even if it’s just a small group.

  10. CJB86 #11

    If I understand correctly, is it also being organized by someone else?
    I was just telling my friend yesterday: if someone approaches you to organize a baby shower... No need for me! Feel free to pass that on. My whole friend drama is already complicated since I got pregnant, so let's not make it any harder!
    Having a nice high tea or lunch with family sounds much more pleasant to me.

    But that's just how I feel. Your story comes across as if you're enjoying it yourself, and not that you have to choose who's in and who's out. It should bring you positive energy. Do what feels right for you!

  11. elisa #12

    I get what you mean... that your family finds it weird and might start "gossiping" or something about you only having two friends! I understand because I’ve been through that too! I’m curious to see what your decision will be

  12. Bla Guest #13

    So relatable. I only have one friend. She just gave birth and had a baby shower—I was invited but couldn’t make it. Lots of girls came, so it must’ve been a lovely party. But I know that if I get pregnant again, there won’t be anything like that for me. No shower, no party… There’s no one to invite. It sometimes hurts quite a bit, but despite that, I actually think it’s fine this way.

  13. JoBu #14

    I've noticed that you make friends much faster with kids. Go to the Baby in Beeld course at the consultatie bureau, go to baby swimming, gymnastics, music, mom's café, etc. Plenty of women in the same life stage. You might not feel it now, but really, once you have kids, making friends becomes much easier.

  14. floydi #15

    Hi girl. I had 3 good friends and my family was there too. All the family I love, not just women. My boyfriend's parents, my sister-in-law, my sister, my dad and his girlfriend. We had a lovely chat and I didn't miss that huge party with all women at all. I always feel a bit fake about those kinds of parties. How can an adult woman with a busy life maintain a good friendship with 15 to 20 women?? I'm very happy and thankful for my loved one and hope you'll be happy with your moment too, regardless of how many people come.

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