Biechthoekje
Quarrel/Stress
AnoniempjeGuest ·
Hi dear pregnant people,
I'm pregnant for the first time and will be entering my second trimester by next Christmas. I'm incredibly happy and grateful for that, but here's the next part. My boyfriend and I basically have screaming, unbearable fights almost every day. After which I end up lying there crying for hours, going crazy from the stress and worries. He naturally feels terrible about it too. But I'm just worried about the little miracle in my belly. And I honestly don't know how to handle this. We both want it to stop and promise each other every day that we will. But every day it happens again! I think because we're both completely exhausted by it all, we snap out of our shoes very quickly. Does anyone else experience this? Or does anyone have tips on how to stay calm and not stress during this already overwhelming period?
Love
I'm pregnant for the first time and will be entering my second trimester by next Christmas. I'm incredibly happy and grateful for that, but here's the next part. My boyfriend and I basically have screaming, unbearable fights almost every day. After which I end up lying there crying for hours, going crazy from the stress and worries. He naturally feels terrible about it too. But I'm just worried about the little miracle in my belly. And I honestly don't know how to handle this. We both want it to stop and promise each other every day that we will. But every day it happens again! I think because we're both completely exhausted by it all, we snap out of our shoes very quickly. Does anyone else experience this? Or does anyone have tips on how to stay calm and not stress during this already overwhelming period?
Love
Replies
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Amy #2
If you're already arguing every day now but still want to stay together, I only have one tip:
Make structural changes and try couples therapy. Bring in an independent third party.
You mention that the December rush has both of you exhausted and reacting that way, but how do you think this will be later with the stress of a baby and sleep deprivation?
That's not a healthy environment for a child.
And right now, it's not a healthy environment for you either as an expectant mom. Stress isn't good for your baby!
Actually, I'd recommend you (temporarily) live apart. Then try to work things out together with help if you really want to stay together.
I've been in a similar situation myself. I even temporarily moved out with two kids, and we did quite a bit of couples therapy.
Don't keep this to yourself—share your problems with people you trust, on both sides of your family and friends.
Sometimes they can offer a fresh perspective, and you can't carry it all alone. Talking to someone can already bring relief. -
Anonymous #3
Hey,
I’d also recommend couples therapy. I’ve had a good experience with it myself. After giving birth, I struggled a lot with my hormones, and we couldn’t get our schedules for housework, work, and free time aligned, which caused a lot of resentment.... I wouldn’t recommend moving out temporarily—that would just widen the rift between you. But staying overnight at your parents’ or your friend’s place is a good idea... A good night’s sleep can work wonders.
Greetings,
Nathalie
www.littlejack.be
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