Baby wish
The environment demands a lot.
Ikke88Guest ·
Hi!
We've been wanting a baby for a long time and our circle knows this. We first wanted to get a house and are now almost done with all the renovations.
Almost every week we hear from acquaintances (when are you going to start?) or conversations with people closer to us always end up revolving around this topic.
Since we're already trying (and not under pressure, by the way), I find it a bit harder to deal with those questions. I notice I'm not opening up as much anymore and don't know how to respond properly.
If we were to say we're trying, I'm afraid people would ask too much about it.
I'm curious how others handle this?
We've been wanting a baby for a long time and our circle knows this. We first wanted to get a house and are now almost done with all the renovations.
Almost every week we hear from acquaintances (when are you going to start?) or conversations with people closer to us always end up revolving around this topic.
Since we're already trying (and not under pressure, by the way), I find it a bit harder to deal with those questions. I notice I'm not opening up as much anymore and don't know how to respond properly.
If we were to say we're trying, I'm afraid people would ask too much about it.
I'm curious how others handle this?
Replies
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floydi #2
Hi there, we got a lot of questions too. We've been together for 3 years, living in our own house for 2 years, both have good jobs—yeah, then people ask, and they think it's normal, hahaha. I didn't get it at all; it's so personal, no one's really bothered. But anyway, it took us 7 months to get pregnant, and that felt really long and uncertain. People kept asking, and I got more and more irritated because it wasn't happening yet. So I told people we weren't ready for kids at all, not for us. Haha, then they stopped asking, and what do you know, the next month I was pregnant. Now at 31 weeks. -
EveS #3
I know those questions too. If I don't feel like talking about it, I say (in my blunt way) "I don't feel like talking about this here. Shall we talk about something else?" And then it's usually over pretty quickly, luckily.
I had a miscarriage in June and the aftermath lasted 3 months. Some friends and family know about this. And last week a friend asked, "Well, I'm not sure if I should even bring it up with you." What I tell them is, "If I want to talk about it, I'll start the conversation myself, and otherwise, indeed, better not to." That works too, and everyone understands.
And you know, there are people who think all sorts of things. Let them do whatever they want. If you don't want to talk about it, then don't do it and just state that. Then it's clear for everyone. -
Ikke88 #4
Maybe it's indeed a good idea to just say what I'm feeling. Sometimes we joke and say 'no pressure', but maybe I/we should be more serious and firm about it. Hopefully, that will make things clear and reduce the pressure. The more people talk about it, the more I find myself preoccupied with it myself, and that's not really helpful either. How long did you wait before talking to others about trying to conceive? There's one friend I don't want to tell yet because she's going through a difficult journey with her own baby wishes. My sister, with whom I have a good relationship, I'd like to completely surprise on the one hand, but on the other, it might be nice to discuss cycle-related things already.
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